Comments on: What’s Wrong with Unstoppable Self-Confidence? http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/ Strategies for Positive Change Fri, 10 Feb 2012 17:29:48 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 By: The Magic of Self-Appointment http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-21893 The Magic of Self-Appointment Fri, 10 Jun 2011 07:09:32 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-21893 [...] and capacity for capitalist thinking. Naturally, you fail to appoint yourself captain of the myriad entrepreneurial opportunities around you. And then you wonder why external appointment eludes [...] [...] and capacity for capitalist thinking. Naturally, you fail to appoint yourself captain of the myriad entrepreneurial opportunities around you. And then you wonder why external appointment eludes [...]

]]> By: Angie http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-18981 Angie Sat, 26 Mar 2011 21:17:41 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-18981 I was blessed to be born with an unshakable self-confidence. I don't know where it came from, but I was also blessed with many gifts and talents. Although I was born into extreme poverty, I always knew that I was going to climb out of it and that I could do whatever I wanted to do. I did, too. I have done everything that I wanted to do despite relatives and, back in the day, teachers and principals, advising me to lower my own expectations. That is not to say that I have never known failure. Oh yes, I have failed many times. It's just that I know that failure is just one way to learn which way NOT to go! Ha! And I look back at my failures as life lessons that actually taught me more than my successes ever did. So, is self-confidence the same as self-esteem? In my case, I don't think it was. My personal situation as a child put me in situations where I allowed myself to believe many negative things about myself. I did have self-esteem issues. However, my self-esteem improved as I left those situations and found success that disproved those negative beliefs. I altered my inner reality to comply with positive feedback that I got that contradicted the stories I learned about myself as an abused child. Yet, my self-confidence level never changed. It has allowed me to overcome barriers that some never do and to follow my dreams to the place where I am now - doing what I have always wanted to do! I know that I have been richly blessed. I don't take these gifts for granted. I'm trying now to use what was freely given to me in service to my fellow man. It is important to my self-esteem that I give back now what was so freely given to me. I was blessed to be born with an unshakable self-confidence. I don’t know where it came from, but I was also blessed with many gifts and talents. Although I was born into extreme poverty, I always knew that I was going to climb out of it and that I could do whatever I wanted to do. I did, too. I have done everything that I wanted to do despite relatives and, back in the day, teachers and principals, advising me to lower my own expectations.

That is not to say that I have never known failure. Oh yes, I have failed many times. It’s just that I know that failure is just one way to learn which way NOT to go! Ha! And I look back at my failures as life lessons that actually taught me more than my successes ever did.

So, is self-confidence the same as self-esteem? In my case, I don’t think it was. My personal situation as a child put me in situations where I allowed myself to believe many negative things about myself. I did have self-esteem issues. However, my self-esteem improved as I left those situations and found success that disproved those negative beliefs. I altered my inner reality to comply with positive feedback that I got that contradicted the stories I learned about myself as an abused child.

Yet, my self-confidence level never changed. It has allowed me to overcome barriers that some never do and to follow my dreams to the place where I am now – doing what I have always wanted to do!

I know that I have been richly blessed. I don’t take these gifts for granted. I’m trying now to use what was freely given to me in service to my fellow man. It is important to my self-esteem that I give back now what was so freely given to me.

]]> By: Jonathan - Advanced Life Skills http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-18189 Jonathan - Advanced Life Skills Wed, 09 Mar 2011 19:45:04 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-18189 Hey Raphael, nice suggestion for an encouraging reality check: "More individuals should step back and remember what they have already overcome and realize how powerful they are right now." It's really nice to have you stop in and say hello! Hey Raphael, nice suggestion for an encouraging reality check: “More individuals should step back and remember what they have already overcome and realize how powerful they are right now.” It’s really nice to have you stop in and say hello!

]]> By: Raphael Love http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-18058 Raphael Love Tue, 08 Mar 2011 22:05:02 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-18058 Confidence is what you gain with each success or lesson learned. I love the thought of starting small when building it up. The accumulation of small victories can over time be an unstoppable force. More individuals should step back and remember what they have already overcome and realize how powerful they are right now. Nice post as usual... Still loving your work sir! Confidence is what you gain with each success or lesson learned. I love the thought of starting small when building it up. The accumulation of small victories can over time be an unstoppable force. More individuals should step back and remember what they have already overcome and realize how powerful they are right now. Nice post as usual… Still loving your work sir!
Raphael Love recently posted..Accountability Episode 8My Profile

]]> By: Debbie @ Happy Maker http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-17629 Debbie @ Happy Maker Wed, 02 Mar 2011 20:11:53 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-17629 You are right Jonathan. Balance is the key to many things in life. You can have all the success in life, but if you don’t have a balance you are only a success in parts of your life. People with true self-confidence are very happy people because of the balance. Debbie You are right Jonathan. Balance is the key to many things in life. You can have all the success in life, but if you don’t have a balance you are only a success in parts of your life. People with true self-confidence are very happy people because of the balance.
Debbie

]]> By: Jonathan - Advanced Life Skills http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-17628 Jonathan - Advanced Life Skills Wed, 02 Mar 2011 20:09:58 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-17628 Hi Daisey, certainly there is no apology necessary. I think about it like this: If one person raises a concern or question in a comment, there were probably other readers who thought those same things but didn't bother to express themselves (I wish they would, but that's just how it is). As a writer, I know that sometimes my choice of words may seem just right to me (because I already know what I mean), but may have a different impact on others. I truly appreciate it when someone cares enough to point out the need for further clarity, even if they knew what I was aiming for. This kind of exchange is what communication is all about and I am grateful to you for participating. Hi Daisey, certainly there is no apology necessary. I think about it like this: If one person raises a concern or question in a comment, there were probably other readers who thought those same things but didn’t bother to express themselves (I wish they would, but that’s just how it is).

As a writer, I know that sometimes my choice of words may seem just right to me (because I already know what I mean), but may have a different impact on others. I truly appreciate it when someone cares enough to point out the need for further clarity, even if they knew what I was aiming for. This kind of exchange is what communication is all about and I am grateful to you for participating.

]]> By: Daisey http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-17594 Daisey Wed, 02 Mar 2011 12:39:49 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-17594 Hi Jonathan, I knew from your context as well as from reading your other posts that your use of the word unstoppable was more in line with determination and perseverance, not letting trials, obstacles, and life's challenges take a bite out of one's self- confidence. Yet, the word just didn't sit right in my gut with what you were trying to say. There are people in the world today who believe they are truly unstoppable who at the expense of others seek their own gain. There are people who run large corporations who have this attitude. Give the wrong person a measure of power and authority and they will embrace it with an attitude of being unstoppable. I've been under this type of authority and I've seen it play out in others. Words have power - my heart just needed to bring out this other reality. I do apologize, however, that I did not include an acknowledgment of what you were meaning in your use of the word. That is something that I regret not having been sensitive enough to point out. In response to your last comment, thank you for your statement of affirmation. I love how you incorporated my statement “there are things others see/know about us that we don’t see/know.” How true that is. Hi Jonathan,
I knew from your context as well as from reading your other posts that your use of the word unstoppable was more in line with determination and perseverance, not letting trials, obstacles, and life’s challenges take a bite out of one’s self- confidence. Yet, the word just didn’t sit right in my gut with what you were trying to say.

There are people in the world today who believe they are truly unstoppable who at the expense of others seek their own gain. There are people who run large corporations who have this attitude. Give the wrong person a measure of power and authority and they will embrace it with an attitude of being unstoppable. I’ve been under this type of authority and I’ve seen it play out in others. Words have power – my heart just needed to bring out this other reality.

I do apologize, however, that I did not include an acknowledgment of what you were meaning in your use of the word. That is something that I regret not having been sensitive enough to point out.

In response to your last comment, thank you for your statement of affirmation. I love how you incorporated my statement
“there are things others see/know about us that we don’t see/know.” How true that is.

]]> By: Jonathan - Advanced Life Skills http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/whats-wrong-with-unstoppable-self-confidence/comment-page-1/#comment-17557 Jonathan - Advanced Life Skills Wed, 02 Mar 2011 06:06:48 +0000 http://advancedlifeskills.com/blog/?p=1290#comment-17557 Hi Debbie, this was so well put: "Good confidence is knowing your weak spot as well as your strong qualities and willing to listen to other when we hit a weak spot." Clearly, self-confidence can be an valuable personal asset as long as it is balanced with reality and a sense of humility. Without this balance it could actually be a liability. Hi Debbie, this was so well put: “Good confidence is knowing your weak spot as well as your strong qualities and willing to listen to other when we hit a weak spot.” Clearly, self-confidence can be an valuable personal asset as long as it is balanced with reality and a sense of humility. Without this balance it could actually be a liability.

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