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Do You Think You Deserve to Receive Abundantly?

receiving abundantly

Do we receive in proportion to our contributions, or do we receive in proportion to our capacity to receive?  I promise you, this question is worthy of your consideration. The major difference between these two schools of thought regarding how we “receive” is that one is conditional, and one is not.

Why does this matter? Because you may be blocking your ability to receive abundantly. There was a time when my own emotions were wrapped around the idea of receiving in proportion to my contributions. In other words, receiving according to what I thought I deserved. Oddly, this was true even though, in my mind, I accepted the idea of receiving in proportion to my capacity to receive.

Are you abundantly confused yet?

Let me walk you through the thinking process that helped me sort this out.  As I thought about it, this is what I came to realize.

1) If we receive only in proportion to what we give, then some part of us is convinced that we must earn what we get.  The subconscious mind reasons something like this: “ I did something, so now I deserve my reward because I earned it.”

2) If I can only receive what I think I deserve then it’s actually linked to ‘wanting’ approval. How so? Somewhere deep inside of me, I was holding the belief that receiving was my just compensation for doing my part.

3) This meant that I needed to approve of my own efforts before I would allow myself to receive that compensation. (Read that again so it soaks in)

Getting what I deserve is conditional receiving

This is essentially the mentality of a wage earner, and in the world of employers and employees that’s exactly how it works.  The thing is, I am not my own employee and my inner sense of approval should be based on who I am, not on what I do or how much I give.

As long as I live in harmony with my true self I will already have my own approval and therefore won’t be “wanting” for it. The approval we all want is from within. When we don’t have that, then we go searching for an external source.

I was obstructing the flow

Everything in life is a flow, energy flows to us and through us.  It doesn’t need our approval. To receive abundantly, we need to learn how to open the gates and get out of the way. But in this case I was actually in my own way. How?

Putting a condition on my ability to receive meant that I was closing the gate and only allowing energy to flow in abundantly once I felt that a sufficient amount had flowed out. That’s not how abundance works. When you’re filled to overflowing, the flow continues. It overflows!

Every time we internalize any sort of problem in life, we disrupt the energy flow.  To restore the flow we need to release the problem.  There are two ways to do this. We can either release every little problem that comes along or we can identify and release the emotion behind the problem.  Get rid of the unhealthy emotion and you get rid of every single problem attached to it, automatically.

Taking it to the next level

If you can identify the emotional category where those “problem” feelings come from, you can actually eliminate the unwanted emotions and all the problems that go with them – all at once.  So, now you actually have three choices for opening the gate to receive abundantly. You can clear out one little problem (limiting emotional anchor) at a time, one small group of problems at a time, or you can dump the whole category all at once.

Every unwanted emotion originates with one of the three “wants.”  It is either a want of approval, a want of security, or a want of control.  In my case I discovered that it was a want of approval.  Whose approval did I want?  My own of course!  Once I got rid of the “want,” what I had left was – approval!  That’s because wanting is a state of lacking and to “have” you must release the want.

Get comfortable with the idea of receiving abundantly

This is a difficult concept to explain in such a short article, but I hope I have at least piqued your interest. I hope you will take some time to have a closer look at your beliefs about receiving abuntaly. Try to free your mind of the idea that you can only receive what you think you deserve. That is a limiting mindset.

The bottom line is this: You have an unlimited capacity to receive. Don’t limit that capacity by making it conditional. It is more than okay to receive abundantly. The goal here is to remove any self-imposed resistance that might be interfering with the flow of positive, abundant energy into your life.

What is your criteria for receiving abundantly?
Are you comfortable with receiving abundantly?
The lines are open!

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31 Comments

  1. Frank September 10, 2010 Reply

    Jonathan,

    This was absoultely amazing to read. I don’t even know how to respond. I guess in my life I have used both trains of thought when it comes to recieiving. I work really hard at my job and I would think I deserve a promotion if there was an opening. I also believe that I have favor to recieve things just from my relgious beliefs. I had never thought to compare both trains of thought. I greatly appreciate you sharing this information with the world.

    • Jonathan September 12, 2010 Reply

      Hi Frank, so glad you found this to be thought provoking. It’s always nice when we are exposed to something that moves us to examine our own internal programs a little closer. I really appreciate you kind words Frank, thanks so much.

  2. Steve September 10, 2010 Reply

    Jonathan, from a Christian standpoint, this dovetails nicely with the concept of grace. In essence, grace is about God giving me all I need and beyond not based on what I do, but based on His love for me. Thanks for sharing a very helpful article.

    We need to be reminded of this all the time, because I think we’re all conditioned to feel like we have to “earn” approval.

    • Jonathan September 12, 2010 Reply

      Hey Steve, it’s no coincidence that we find so many powerful and practical strategies, concepts, truths, and life skills in the most widely published and read book in the world.

  3. Sandra Lee September 10, 2010 Reply

    This article really touched me. My favorite line is this one: “Everything in life is a flow, energy flows to us and through us. It doesn’t need our approval. All we really need to do is open the gates and get out of the way.”

    Open the gates, get out of the way ~ I’ll be meditating on that! As always, I thank you for the tremendous inspiration.

    • Jonathan September 12, 2010 Reply

      Hi Sandra, most people are familiar with the concept of resistance. But what tends to escape their notice is the source of all that resistance in their lives. All resistance comes from us. We are it’s source and with practice we can learn to get out of our own way.

  4. John Duffield September 11, 2010 Reply

    Hello Jonathan. I believe we all deserve to be ourselves. Ciao John Duffield

    • Jonathan September 12, 2010 Reply

      Hi John, I believe you are absolutely right my friend. In fact, I believe that being our true self is the best way to eliminate resistance and allow ourselves to receive beyond our wildest dreams.

  5. Stephen September 11, 2010 Reply

    Hi Jonathan, this was an interesting article and I think you are on to something. I think we limit ourselves by resistance to what life is trying to bring. If we would just stop fighting it and let it flow in as you say, we would find that the good life arrives a lot more easily.

    • Jonathan September 12, 2010 Reply

      Hi Stephen, for some reason it takes awareness to realize that we are swimming against the flow. The next step is to realize that we can direct the flow. Doesn’t that sound like more fun than struggling to resist it?

  6. Joy September 12, 2010 Reply

    Jonathan,
    I’ve always held the belief that I receive based upon my capacity to receive..However, that means that as you stated *I* had to get out of my own way..I understand if something is ‘limited’ in my life I’ve made it so..and I’ve had to learn to be as grace filled at receiving as I am at giving..
    My life is as grand and as magical as I allow it to be..so I’ve learned to allow my heart to be open fully to the moment regardless of external circumstances.

    • Jonathan September 12, 2010 Reply

      Greetings Joy, This phrase pretty much pulls it all together: “My life is as grand and as magical as I allow it to be.” Thanks for sharing that with us.

  7. Robin Easton September 12, 2010 Reply

    Wow!! This sure made me stop and absorb! I am really starting to experience the letting go and knowing that I can just be ME, and that I don’t have to think, “Well, I did this so now THIS will happen, or I will “get” this back, or I will be able to receive THIS.”

    There has been a huge shift where I am beginning to feel that just being my “True Self” : ) could actually be enough. That I could get out of my own way and actually TRUST that I am enough. That who I am, what I am, all that I am is enough. Now THAT brings tears to my eyes. I am like the tree on the trail; it IS enough.

    And through this place of letting go, getting out of my own way, not setting up some kind of “give and receive system”, that I could live in astounding harmony with the world around me. I CAN let go. We ARE enough. We all are.

    This doesn’t mean that we can’t continue to learn, grow, heal, and so forth, it just means that we can let go of the “send and receive system” and just be ourselves.

    I am headed out the door for a 4 mile walk/jog to meet my husband, so this may not be very clear dear Jonathan, but I hope some of it will come through. I think I need to do a post about it. You have inspired much in me…as always.

    Anyway, this is profound and very moving. I am glad you wrote it. Sending you and P. much love, Robin

    • Jonathan September 13, 2010 Reply

      Hi Robin, in the really big picture (the one we can’t fully comprehend) everything is based on an action-reaction exchange. So the concept of give and receive is not without merit. But this happens on such a universal plane that the complexity of the interactions can’t be understood, and doesn’t need to be. All we need to know is “plug in and let go.” The rest will take care of itself.

  8. Sibyl Chavis September 12, 2010 Reply

    Jonathan: I thought this was great advice. Thanks for sharing it. I do think it is easy to fall into the trap of getting in the way of your natural energy that allows things to just flow. I can see why having expectations that you will get certain things in return will work against you. I think you have to be motivated to do things for the right reasons and not just focus on what you are getting in return. Thanks for sharing your insights and wisdom. Great post.

    • Jonathan September 13, 2010 Reply

      Hi Sibyl, you hit on a VERY important point. Motive is everything! Any act can be prompted by a variety of motives. The result of those actions might appear the same, but the motive behind them be completely different. If one person was motivated by love and the other by greed, the energy will create a completely different universal response. What they attract into their lives will not be the same at all.

  9. Nadia Ballas-Ruta September 13, 2010 Reply

    Hi Jonathan,

    This was an excellent post. A long time ago, I used to do what I could to force a certain result. It worked for a while but then I started to notice that it just was too much work. So I let it go.

    What I came to realize was that how I do things matters more than the outcome. As long as I do quality work (regardless of the task) and my intention is a sincere one, my conscience can be at peace and when I am at peace, then life has an interesting way of taking me places.

    Our lives are a reflection of our actions. What we put out into the world inevitably comes back to us. And I aim to create beauty in all that I do…or so I try.

  10. Lauren September 13, 2010 Reply

    Dear Jonathon,

    What came to mind when reading your post was how often I hear people say if you don’t take care of yourself you have nothing to give others.

    My thought is I deserve to take care of myself for the sake of self-love and self-care, not simply in reference to what I can give others.

    They are not mutually exclusive.

    I love the insight you’re providing in this post. We ARE worthy and giving and receiving is a flow of energy. When we are in the flow it’s not even in question.

    Love is in us and all around us. We are love. In that flow, we know our worth.

    Thanks Jonathon.

    Be well,
    Lauren

  11. Debbie September 22, 2010 Reply

    This really tells it like it is. It is amazing what the mind can or can’t do for us, depending on our own thinking. I think there are a lot of people that get in there own way when it comes to getting what they really want or don’t want.
    When it comes to God I always look at it this way. If a child ask his or her parent for a drink of water. Would the parent give them a rock instead? God works that way. He wants us to have what we need, but if we feel we don’t deserve it, it is like turning God down. We have to believe that we do deserve the best.

  12. Tracey September 29, 2010 Reply

    Thanks for this post, I’m a little late in reading it (from when it was posted) but it resonated with me simply because I’m constantly working to get out of my own way. I can be my biggest stumbling block and it’s difficult to change.

  13. Christine October 3, 2010 Reply

    For the last few years now, particularly the last few months, I’ve been wrapping myself around the idea of receiving “in proportion to your contributions” INSTEAD of receiving in proportion to “our capacity to receive”. I can’t say that I’ve chosen the latter school of thought over the former yet, in fact I recently caught myself thinking, “I want only as much love as I deserve, and so I want for nothing.” Which, according to my boyfriend, is flawed thinking..

    But reading this article has helped me to organize my thoughts about what people deserve. Rather, what I deserve. But are ALL people so deserving? I am yet to be convinced. Still, thank you for sharing your thoughts with us.

  14. Jack December 23, 2011 Reply

    Jonathan,

    You said “Try to free your mind of the idea that you can only receive what you think you deserve.” This is definitely different from the philosophy I have heard before (and some are mentioning here) that you should believe that you deserve the best, to love yourself etc…

    It is my understanding that what you are saying is to unlink the connection between deserving and receiving. Do you think this is more powerful than allowing yourself to feel that you deserve to love yourself for no other reason than being you? After reading your article I get the feeling that you have great insight on the topic and I’m really interested on your opinion about the difference between these two separate ideas which both seem like they may work in their own ways.

  15. Jonathan December 23, 2011 Reply

    Hi Jack, nice observations. Viewed with the right perspective I think the two ideas become just two aspects of one approach. We should allow ourselves to receive unconditionally (in other words, without feeling that we had to earn it, including love and approval). And, we should love ourselves unconditionally even if we feel that we still have some room for improvement. When we remove “conditional requirements” from loving ourselves and from allowing ourselves to receive good things into our lives (love, happiness, abundance, etc.), we essentially remove the obstacles that prevent us from receiving those things.

  16. Jack December 24, 2011 Reply

    Jonathan,

    Thanks a lot. That really cleared things up for me. Hopefully I can use this time during the holidays being around the family and an already loving environment to try to practice these things. Have a merry christmas.

  17. Olivia September 6, 2012 Reply

    Jonathan,

    This is a great article and definitely what I needed! Thanks a bunch for writing it.

  18. Mags January 26, 2013 Reply

    Hi
    While deeply relaxing last year I saw myself as a toddler and I heard myself saying ‘If I don’t make them happy they will hurt me.’ I tried different methods to get to the bottom of what had happened but wasn’t able to and in the end let it go and focused on trying to heal the emotions. Still ‘working on myself’ I realised this morning that my relationship with everyone and everything up to this point in my life has been based on that statement. I’m at the point now were I feel (or felt) that unless I fulfilled a,b, and c then God/the Universe would punish me. Suffice to say I was never good enough. Although on some level I have always known this and touched on it now and again, I didn’t associate it with that statement. It’s in my consciousness now instead of my subconscience and I don’t know where to go from here. I’ve decided to just let it ‘float around me’ and do google searches and see what comes up and your website did. Thank you for reaffirming somewhat what I have now realised.

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