The people we interact with on a regular basis will have a profound influence on us. They not only affect our attitude toward life, but also our very life experience. That’s why it is so important to take time to evaluate what kind of influence our working relationships are having on us, and visa versa.
We may think that we are immune to the influence of those around us, but that is simply not true. Perhaps we have convinced ourselves that we can just tune them out and remain unaffected. But the very fact that we recognize the need to resist their influence shows that the influence does exist.
Choice and responsibility
Granted, we can’t always choose whose company we are in. In many cases, such as work or school, we have little if any choice in the matter. But when we do have a choice, it’s an opportunity to enrich our lives on many levels. We can benefit immensely by purposely choosing to interact with, and create working relationships with those who have a positive and appreciative attitude.
There is also some personal responsibility involved here that we want to be aware of. If we want to keep company with positive, encouraging people, then our contribution to the relationship should also be positive and encouraging. All relationships are a give and take arrangement. Consequently, if we want to be encouraged by others, we should strive to be encouraging to them.
Building positive working relationships
Now you may personally interact with dozens of people on a daily basis, so what is it that draws you toward some more than others? Mutual recognition of the give and take principal is what contributes to building closer relationships. When somebody seems to needy or greedy, we become more guarded. When someone does something nice for us, we feel impelled to make it reciprocal.
The beauty of this arrangement is that we can take the initiative. That’s right, we can assume the role of the giver and see what kind of response is generated. I am not suggesting that we give with the expectation of getting something in return. In fact, I am very much in favor of giving without expectation. But giving opens the door to, in fact it invites, mutual exchange.
This works for all types of relationships
Increasingly, people interact through channels other than face to face encounters. These principles apply to every kind of interaction. For me personally, much of my interaction takes place online. Every day I communicate with people from all over the world. Some of those people are part of my life on a daily basis, and I like to think that those relationships are mutually beneficial.
The real beauty of this arrangement is that we have chosen to grow our relationships because we share similar interests and goals. At the same time, our fields of expertise vary enough that we are able to learn from one another and to contribute to each others growth. These are positive and mutually beneficial relationships. It is a win – win situation that I find very encouraging.
The role of social media
We always hear that social media is built on relationships, but is that really true? At first glance, sites like facebook, twitter and google+ may just seem like a lot of disconnected noise. But is that all there is to it? Is it really possible to build solid working relationships that make a real contribution to your life through these channels?
The answer is absolutely yes, and the truth of that fact is the motivation behind this post. I have built a number of these mutually beneficial working relationships from these very sources and I wanted to acknowledge a few of them. Actually, I want to acknowledge all of them, but I will only focus on a few that can serve as examples for this discussion.
Activities that contribute to positive working relationships
Here are some of the activities that involve some form of interaction with other people online, along with some of the benefits.
1) Commenting on each other’s blogs. When I contribute a meaningful comment to someone else’s blog post it helps keep the conversation going and increases the value of their article. My comment creates a link back to my blog which brings me new readers. Even though I don’t have as much time for this activity as I once did, it is still a excellent way to encourage positive working relationships.
2) Using facebook, twitter or google+. Alerting those in my timeline when something worthwhile is posted by a friend brings them traffic because it exposes them to a new audience. The same thing happens when they like, tweet, or g+ one of my articles. The beauty of this arrangement is that very little effort is required, but there is plenty of value.
3) Reading each other’s articles. Those I choose to interact with are known for creating real value. By reading each other’s articles we learn from one another which adds to our depth of understanding while constantly exposes us to new perspectives.
4) Asking and answering questions. If we have a technical question or are searching for a resource, chances are that someone in our positive working relationship circle has the answer. This has been very helpful to me personally on several occasions.
5) Direct linking. We can write articles and purposely link to something on a friends blog. This serves our readers and the links help those in our circle with their search engine rankings. Everyone I know appreciates a little link love now and then!
A few examples
These are just a few of the interesting and informative articles that I have enjoyed reading recently.
* Mottos that Inspire Greatness: The Power of Personal Mottos, Part III
. . by Ken Wert at Meant to be Happy.
* 20 Top Bloggers Share Their Most Life-Altering Fearless Action
. . by Barrie Davenport at Live Bold and Bloom.
* The Power of a Promise Kept
. . by Alex Blackwell at The BridgMaker.
* Why You Need to Follow Your Passion
. . by Steve Aitchison at Change Your Thoughts.
* Fetching Friday – Resources Mashup & Last of the Great Unknown
. . by Kristi Hines at Kikolani.
* 20 Motivational Quotes by Dale Carnegie On Happiness and Success
. . by Nea Joy at Self Improvement Saga.
Relationships matter even online
As you can see, there has been a mutually beneficial exchange of resources and encouragement here. Trust me when I tell you that this list barely scratched the surface. There were many more activities and quite a few other people involved. Interacting on this level is a good example of how making wise choices about your associates can have a positive influence on your life experience.
Want more? Follow the links of those who comment on this blog and you will discover some very interesting people with a lot of value to contribute.
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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }
Jonathan, fantastic article on the value and quite simply the pure joy of positive relationships. I agree completely with all five of your examples. I try to do all of those things and I learned them from people like you. These interactions are incredibly helpful to me both practically and emotionally. My online friends and the interactions in the blogging world mean a lot to me and I can’t imagine being without them at this point.
Jonathan, this is a great article. I have surfed the Internet and worked on the Web for many years but it is only recently that I have started blogging and interacting on other blogs. I have already made some great relationships that bring value to my life. Value in the form of encouragement and inspiration.
I avoided social networks for the longest time. It’s only been this past year that I started leveraging them to find old friends and business. Ultimately, the benefit has been much greater than anticipated and agree that time that I put into these sites is not a waste whatsoever. It feels good to make old and NEW connections.
It’s incredible how the whole relationships mechanism has been enhanced by the Internet. I’m here for more than 10 years and I can say that most of my relationships are made through Internet. And yes, I do have a real life, and those relationships transformed in time in real friends or real business partners. I loved the way this post was outlined, it should be an example for everyone who consider enlarging their relationship network.
Hello, this is such an honestly from the heart post. I think many of the people you have mentioned I read their blogs and have respect and admiration for from their insight and wisdom. People are our best assets in life.The internet allows us to meet others that we may not have ever had the opportunity to be influenced by.
Staying in touch with people who I have worked with over the years has been easy to do. It is a great way of giving to the community. Having a voice and using it to help others.There is a mutual respect with everyone. Gratitude is given more freely I think, then when it is face to face. Great article!
I am in awe at this “most excellent” article about the power of people. Some we connect with and some we avoid. Being supportive and choosing to be inspired by instead of torn down by people is a great lesson for me.
Jonathan –
You’ve given us a very good social media 101 … this would be useful for the questions raised by newbies, and might even be good for the experienced to brush-up a bit.
Awesome post, Jonathan. I agree that positive relationships are so very important both online and offline. Whether or not I see a person face-to-face isn’t what’s important. We support each other, pull together on projects together, get updates on what’s going on in each others life, share our thoughts on subjects that matter to us. All of this has an impact on my life and I choose the right people to make sure that impact is a positive one. I also do my best to offer the same in return. I want to serve as someone that my friends (offline and online) can trust and depend on in many ways.
One thing I’ve done is to make sure that my Facebook timeline is a reflection of me. I don’t just have a big sea of people labeled friends. I connect with people whose positive energy, motivation and inspiration are regularly on display; and we bounce around lots of great ideas.
I feel so honored to have friends like this–friends like YOU–in my corner. It’s my hope that everyone will find ways to make such connections online.
Thank you for being you!
Nea | Self Improvement Saga recently posted..Inspirational Thoughts: Inner Peace Is Your Ticket to Paradise
Definitely! I used to be wary of online relationships. I used to think they were shallow and would never be real. This was years ago. I’ve now come to the realisation that they do work – and that you can make real friends online.
I know I have – on my blogs, twitter etc. While we shouldn’t give in order to get, it’s really special when someone you’ve never met reciprocates when you’ve done something nice for them. It just draws you closer and makes you want to do even more.
Some people online (whose blogs are bigger than mine) have seen it fit to reciprocate good things I’ve done for them online. This just goes to show that not everyone has forgotten where they’ve come from. This is such an encouragement.
Anne @ confidence building recently posted..How To Build Confidence To Delegate
Jonathan,
This is a thought-provoking article in some ways! I enjoy your encouragement to extend a hand and give. I feel some of my closest connections exists online. But I know some bloggers sometimes wonder if some of their online connections are based more on the idea of someone wanting something in return. It’s an interesting question!
Sandra / Always Well Within recently posted..The Wisdom of Flowing with Change: An Interview with the Vizier