How many barriers are there to personal growth? Which ones have the greatest effect on your ability to create positive change in your life? Once you become aware of your personal roadblocks, you’ll be in an excellent position to overcome them. Let’s look at some possible contenders.

1. Loosely defined goals. Setting goals is such a fundamental part of achievement. Sounds basic, I know, but don’t make the mistake of thinking that everyone already knows what they want. I’ve found over and over again that vague, undefined goals are the norm rather than the exception. There are several factors that can keep you from defining exactly what you want. But regardless of the exact reason, if we can’t accurately define our goals, what chance do we have of actually achieving them?

People with goals succeed because they know where they’re going.
~Earl Nightingale

A high degree of focus is required to create a new desired outcome. If all we have is a vague idea of what we want, then what is there to focus on? Lack of focus is a common roadblock to personal development and it leaves a person feeling like their efforts never produce the results they were hoping for. If you are going to set goals, make sure you take the time define them so you have something to focus on.

2. Current status unknown. Once you know where you want to go, it is vital that you accurately and honestly assess exactly where you are right now. If you don’t know where you are in relation to where you want to be, how will you be able to gauge your progress? Without honest self evaluation you will be like a ship without a rudder, adrift in an ocean of busy work or procrastination. You’ll be doing a lot, but accomplishing very little. You can avoid this roadblock to personal development by taking inventory of your current situation to get an accurate picture of where you are.

If you don’t know where you are going, any road will get you there.
~Lewis Carroll

3. Focusing on what you don’t want. In an effort to avoid problems we can easily end up putting our focus on the outcomes we want to avoid. Because the mind is only creative, it will always try to attract or create the object of our focus. This is true even when it is something we are trying to avoid. Can you see why it is so important to focus on what you want, and take your mind off of what you don’t want?

Success is focusing the full power of all you are on what you have a burning desire to achieve. ~Wilfred Peterson

Obviously, we need to be aware of possible pitfalls and steer clear of them, but our primary focus needs to be in the direction we want to go. This sounds easy, but the fear of failing or of making a costly mistake can act like a powerful emotional magnet that captures our attention in subtle ways. Learning to master your focus is the best way to avoid creating what you don’t want.

4. Internal conflict. Of all the roadblocks to personal development, this is the one that can sabotage your effort without you even knowing what happened. If we haven’t taken the time to discover our deepest personal standards and values then we are vulnerable to this kind of inner disharmony. To create internal harmony we must live and act in harmony with our core values, but we can’t do that if we don’t know what those values are. In my coaching practice this is an area that I pay careful attention to, especially if there seems to be some self sabotaging tendencies.

The greatest conflicts are not between two people but between one person and himself. ~Garth Brooks

The best way to avoid this roadblock is to analyze you deepest core values and make sure that everything you do is in harmony with them. In my book TRUE SELF there are several exercises that walk you through the process of creating internal harmony.

5. Limiting or obsolete beliefs. In particular, I am referring to your beliefs about what you think you are or are not capable of, and what you think you do or do not deserve. It is through the window of these beliefs that we form our self image and try to make sense out of the things going on around us. We also use them to form assumptions about likely future results. These beliefs may have been established during childhood and have now outlived their usefulness. Others may be leftover from situations and circumstances that are no longer relevant.

It is important that we evaluate our beliefs regularly to see if they are serving us or holding us back. There are two formidable problems with limiting beliefs. First of all, these beliefs often operate on a subconscious level, screened of from our conscious awareness. Second, even if we are aware of them, changing beliefs can be very challenging because they usually have a strong emotional component making them almost impervious to logic.

You can have anything you want if you will give up the belief that you can’t have it. ~Dr. Robert Anthony

Overcoming this roadblock is one of the main reasons clients come to me for coaching. If you have this challenge and can’t seem to get past it, have a look at this five part series called How Your Beliefs Create Your Reality. If you still can’t get past it you might consider getting some assistance from someone who has the skills to help you.

6. Delegating personal responsibility. The quality of our life is our personal responsibility. This is the foundation of all personal development. We can either accept conditions as they are, or accept the responsibility for changing them. Whatever we choose to do, we must acknowledge that we are the only person responsible for our decisions and actions. Taking personal responsibility is one of the most liberating things you can do because it completely eliminates the temptation to blame anyone or anything and it puts you in the driver’s seat of your life.

Freedom is the will to be responsible to ourselves. ~Friedrich Nietzsche

7. Resistance to change. One of the best ways to beat this resistance is to practice letting go. When we successfully break our emotional attachments to “what is,” we allow room for growth. To do this we need to develop strategies for severing those attachments, because letting go is easier said than done. On an emotional level, there is a sense of security related to “hanging on.” Consequently, learning to let go can be challenging.

Embrace change for it is the essence of life. ~Jonathan Wells

As you embrace small changes in your life, your emotional security anchors will shift. Over time your resistance will fade and you will find comfort and security in a more fluid reality. When this happens, continued personal growth becomes your new security anchor.

What roadblocks have you encountered on the personal growth path?
How have you managed to overcome your personal roadblocks?
The lines are open!

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Why would I even ask that question? Well, let’s think about the differences between the two for a minute. A caterpillar crawls from leaf to leaf, eating, sleeping, and crawling. He does the same thing, day in and day out, not realizing that anything else is possible. A butterfly, on the other hand, goes where it wants to go, and drinks nectar from the choicest flowers. Some butterflies travel thousands of miles to spend the winter in a warm, sunny climate.

Clearly, the difference between the two is extraordinary. What is even more extraordinary is the fact that the butterfly was once an ordinary caterpillar.

Programmed by instinct

The caterpillar has no idea that, hidden in his genetic structure is the potential to become a beautiful butterfly. After all, he was born a caterpillar and that’s all he has ever known. Even if a butterfly lands right next to him on a leaf, the caterpillar simply cannot grasp the difference. It’s outside of his frame of reference.

When instinct finally moves him to build a cocoon around himself and begin a transformation that will forever change his life, he still doesn’t know what is going on. That is because everything he does is according to instinct. He does what he is programmed to do.  Unlike you and me, the caterpillar does not have a choice.

In the absence of instinct

In our case, instinct is not usually enough to bring about a complete life transformation. Fortunately we have something more than instinct. Unlike that caterpillar, we have freedom of choice. We also have the ability to comprehend that more is possible. Even if we have never lived the life we truly desire, we still recognize that such a life is possible.

Somewhere inside of us, we are all convinced that a life of true fulfillment and satisfaction is our birthright. So, for us, the question is not so much, “is it possible,” but rather, “how is it possible?” How do we go about transforming our current existence into the life of our dreams?

Never mind the odds, they’re irrelevant

If everybody around us was living a happy and satisfying life, it would seem like a much more realistic goal. But that’s not the case, is it? In fact, most people’s lives more closely resemble that of the caterpillar, rather than the butterfly.

Don’t let the lack of obvious examples lead you to believe that living the life of your dreams is not possible. The choices that other people make have nothing to do with what is possible for you to achieve. If you make different choices, you can achieve different results. So then, odds have absolutely nothing to do with it. In reality, it all comes down to personal choice. Of course, when we make a choice, we need the knowledge to back it up. I could choose to be a molecular biologist, but my choice would never become a reality if I did not acquire the right knowledge.

What kind of knowledge?

When it comes to transforming your life, certain uncommon skills are required. So, we usually need to acquire the right kind of knowledge and then apply what we learn to develop these uncommon skills. As you know, I call them advanced life skills.

Most of us have been denied this knowledge, and as a result, most are lacking in these skills. That doesn’t mean that these skills are difficult, it just means that through the normal course of our life we have never had the opportunity to learn them.

What would you do if you were given the opportunity?

The funny thing about opportunity is that it only has value if we take advantage of it. How many missed opportunities can you look back on? I think we’ve all missed our share for one reason or another.

If you were given the opportunity to break through your current obstacles and radically alter the quality of your life, would you take advantage of it? I am convinced that you would because everyone who reads this blog and subscribes to my newsletter is actively seeking ways to improve their lives.

Your choice, caterpillar or butterfly!

It’s my job to provide you with opportunities to gain the knowledge and develop those uncommon life skills for accelerated personal growth. It’s your job to choose what you want to do with those opportunities. At some point we all have to make a choice.

Do you want to go on searching or hoping as life passes you by? Do you want to continue gathering bits and pieces of useful information, and trying to put them all together for yourself? Or, are you finally ready to make a personal breakthrough?

Personally, I think you are ready!
What do you think?
The lines are open!

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Would you like to rearrange your current reality? Do you feel like you are ready to begin creating your life by design and manifesting the things you truly desire? If so, then I would like to share six simple steps that you can begin taking right now to help you improve your life.

1. Focus on what you intend to manifest. Quit focusing on what is missing from your life. This includes what you don’t want to see happen. As soon as you become aware that you are focusing on what you don’t have, choose a different thought. Shift your focus to what you intend to attract and manifest in your life. Put yourself in a state of receiving and accepting and move away from the state of lacking or wanting.

2. Stop struggling. If you find yourself viewing your present circumstances as the reason why you can’t have what you want, stop thinking that way. Whatever difficulties you are currently facing, know they are only temporary and will last only as long as you continue to give them your attention. You attract what you focus on so move your focus away from your current difficulties and end the struggle.

3. Live in the here and now. Focusing on the past will just program you for more of the same. If you find yourself thinking about how things have always been, change your focus! If you keep doing things the same old way, you will keep getting the same old results. What’s the definition of insanity? Doing the same thing over and over again while expecting different results! Focus on the present; learn to live in the here and now.

4. Quit telling the same old stories. Stop sharing your worn out tales of woe with others. When you quit telling your dramatic story, you won’t have to live up to those stories anymore. Replaying those stories is the same as reliving them. It’s impossible to move forward when you’re always looking backward.

5. Do it for YOU! Don’t worry about what others expect of you, or think is best for you. Everyone has an opinion on how you should live your life. When you feel pressure to live up to someone else’s expectations, stop and consider whether or not their expectations are in harmony with yours, if not, do what’s best for you. You are creating your own life and you need to live accordingly.

6. Don’t create negative energy. Try to let go of making unqualified judgments. Don’t decide a situation or a person is good or bad, right or wrong. Passing judgment requires emotional involvement and this practice only creates negative energy. Remember, like attracts like, so, beware of attracting into your life the very thing you are judging in the life of others.

There is more power here than you might think

I know that on their own these six steps probably don’t seem significant enough to change the course of your life. That’s because they are designed to create a subtle shift rather than a radical change in direction. But don’t underestimate the results from a three degree shift in course.

If you were flying from New York to London and the pilot was just one degree off course the whole time you would probably miss Europe altogether. Changing your life is often a case of making small adjustments that produce huge benefits in the long run. If you improve your life with small changes today the results will compound over time.

Can small changes really yield significant results?
Do you see room for any of these simple steps in your life?
The lines are open!

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Let’s do a little visualizing and see what kind of personal insight we can gain. Take a minute and close your eyes as you think about your ideal scenario for your life. To make things interesting, allow yourself to abandon all limitations.

If you could create your version of a deeply satisfying, enjoyable, meaningful, empowering life experience, what would it look like? What would it feel like? Who else would be there? Where would you live? What kind of activities would you spend your time on? What kind of physical, emotional, and financial space would you be in?

Go ahead and fill in all the details until the picture looks and feels just right. In fact, don’t open your eyes until you are really clear on all the details and can actually feel yourself in the picture.

Hold that beautiful vision in your mind

How does that visualized life compare with your current reality? Is it close? Are you moving toward it, or is the difference like night and day? Guess what, it really doesn’t matter because life is not a destination, it’s a journey. The important thing is that we are traveling in the direction we want to go and enjoying ourselves along the way.

The vision is important because it defines our path and gives us something to move toward, not because life starts when we get there. Life is what happens along the way and that’s where we need to have that deeply satisfying, enjoyable, meaningful, empowering life experience.

How do we do that?

This is where personal development comes in. Why do you think the whole concept of personal development and self-improvement is so popular these days? It’s because our path defines our personal growth process. Amazingly, most people don’t fully appreciate the life altering paradigm shift that happens as a result of pursuing our personal vision of a truly meaningful life.

There seems to be a natural tendency to focus on the external results that come from things like improving our communication skills or learning to effectively set and achieve goals. Don’t get me wrong, those things are certainly valuable, but there is more, much more! Striving to live up to a higher standard (our vision) always creates greater value in our personal lives and the lives of those around us.

The internal shift

Personal development has a profound effect on every single aspect of our life.  As we grow on a personal level, we begin to feel more passionate about life in general. We are naturally more motivated because learning and growing add motivation and a sense of excitement.

Personal development provides us with both the incentive and the means to become the best possible version of ourselves.  Instead of becoming more self-focused, personal development expands our frame of reference to include the people around us.  As our world expands, so does our awareness of the possibilities and opportunities around us. This possibility mindset fills us with an attitude of eager anticipation as we look forward to each new day.

Forget ordinary, go for extraordinary!

Contrast this with a lifestyle that seems endlessly repetitive. A mere existence, made up of a mundane routine with nothing much to look forward to except getting through the day, the week, the year.  Learning gets replaced with mindless entertainment as a person’s world grows smaller and smaller.  That’s what happens to people who abandon their vision.

We all started out believing that a better life is possible.  At some point in our lives, we all dreamed of accomplishing great things and living a life of value and purpose.  Unfortunately, it is far too easy to allow the demands and frustrations of daily living to dampen those hopes and squash those dreams.  When this happens we begin to settle for just getting by. Without a vision, life can be so demanding that it leaves you feeling trapped on an endless merry-go-round that never leads anywhere.

Never abandon your beautiful vision!

The truth is, we all have the capacity to take charge of our lives and to make our dreams come true.  Yes, this requires that we learn new skills and change our beliefs about what is possible, but what could be more exciting than that?

Personal development is a doorway to a life that is both exciting and fulfilling - A life that is full of endless opportunities and amazing possibilities.  Don’t allow your life to become an endurance contest; you deserve much more than that.

Personal development is an opportunity to reclaim your dreams, transform your life and make a valuable contribution to the world around you. So hang onto your vision no matter what and view each day as an opportunity to move in that direction. See life as an adventure in personal growth and remember, life is not a destination, it’s a journey.

How does your vision make you feel?
Do you feel like you are moving in the right direction?
The lines are open!

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Without question, there are many factors that have influenced your personal development and helped shape the kind of person you are today. Of all the things that have contributed to your personal growth, which one would you say has had the greatest influence on you personally?

The influence of those we associate with has a major effect on the person we become. Oddly, we may not even recognize how powerful this influence really is because it can be very subtle. Still, we know that even imperceptible promptings applied over an extended period of time can exert tremendous persuasive power.

Don’t underestimate the power of peer pressure

Peer pressure can be one of those extremely powerful forces in our lives. The direction of our personal development is directly impacted by our daily habits and rituals. We tend to pick up the habits of the people we spend time with. For instance, consider these examples.

If you hang around with people who burn through every dime they make partying, chances are very strong that you’ll develop that same pattern. If you spend most of your time around people who choose television over reading, chances are you won’t read much either.

Have you ever been stuck around someone who constantly cusses? If so, did you notice a change in your own choice of words? This can happen even if you have an initial aversion to bad language. If you hear it often enough it begins to seem normal and acceptable.

Peer pressure as a powerful motivator

If we continually associate with people who don’t share the same goals and aspirations as we do, their influence can completely undermine our personal growth. If we really want our lives to move in a certain direction, we need to pay special attention to the company we keep.

By choosing to spend time with like-minded people we reinforce and strengthen our own focus and resolve. If you want to become better at something, spend time in the company of those who are already good at it and you will improve. Peer pressure can be a powerful motivator for positive personal development if we make wise choices about who we allow to influence us.

The personal growth equivalent of “friendly fire”

I realize that the lesson here seems obvious. The reason I mention it is because I frequently work with people who say they can’t make any progress on their goals, and guess what! In many cases it turns out that their personal growth efforts are being undermined by the influence of the people around them.

Here’s one that comes up quite often. “No matter how much I exercise and try to watch my diet I can’t lose any weight.” My first question is, “are your friends overweight?” Next question, “do they share your passion for food?”

After we pursue this line of reasoning for a while it usually comes down to, “but they’re my friends.”

Choose the direction of you want to go

It’s not my place to say who your friends should be, and that’s not the point of this article. The point is this; the people you associate with have a strong influence on the direction of your personal growth. You owe it to yourself to consider what sort of influence they are exerting.

You need to keep checking whether those you associate with are moving you in a positive direction or a negative one. Are they supporting your efforts to reach your goals or preventing you from taking affirmative action? Are they supporting your personal development, or pulling you off course?

Personal growth lesson from a little bird

Perhaps you’ve heard the story of the little bird. He had his wing over his eye and he was crying. Mr. Owl said to the little bird, “I see you are crying.” “Yes,” said the little bird, as he pulled his wing away from his eye. “Oh, I see,” said Mr. Owl. “You’re crying because the big bird pecked out your eye.” And the little bird said, “No, I’m not crying because the big bird pecked out my eye. I’m crying because I let him do it.”

Personal growth and peer pressure, it’s your choice

It’s easy to let outside influences shape our lives, and to let our associates determine our personal growth direction. It can be extremely difficult to break off from the crowd to pursue your own path. It is important to remember that when it comes to peer pressure, there are no innocent bystanders. Once we are out of our parents homes, we get to choose the people who influence us.

Try this, take a look at the people you spend your time with and ask yourself, “Do I want to turn out like them?” If the answer is yes, that’s great, you will benefit from their influence. But if the answer is no, you need to seriously consider making some different choices so you don’t end up like that little bird.

What kind of influence are your friends having on you?
Is the overall tone of your peer pressure inline with your personal goals?
The lines are open!

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Before we can really lock into meaningful personal development and create the life we truly desire, there are a number of basic concepts that must be accepted. In personal development, as in any other field, there are fundamental truths that exist. If we want to experience optimal results, we need to understand and fully embrace those truths.

While the existence of these personal development truths may be generally accepted on an intellectual level, more than acknowledgment is required. This seems to be one of the major differences between people who make things happen in life, and those who can’t figure out why things are the way they are.

“I know” doesn’t get it done!

If you have ever raised a teenager, you are probably familiar with the phrase “I know.” That’s what you hear when they neglected to do something. Obviously, knowing wasn’t enough. When it comes to our own personal development, could we be doing the same thing?

Many people who know the following 7 personal development truths are not getting the results they would like for this very reason. To get past that tendency, I invite you to use this list for some honest self-evaluation. As you look at each item, you may think to yourself: “I already know that.” In that case, stop and ask yourself: “Am I doing something with that knowledge?” In other words, are you really following through?

7 basics personal development truths

1) Always take responsibility for your life. We must recognize that our life is our personal responsibility. This is the foundation of all personal development. We can either accept conditions as they are, or accept the responsibility for changing them. Whatever we choose to do, we must acknowledge that we are the only person responsible for our decisions and actions. Taking personal responsibility is the catalyst of all positive personal power. Do you honestly believe that?

2) Make a commitment to taking massive action. Planning and deciding are very important steps, but without action they have almost no value. Likewise, halfhearted or limited action is not going to get things done. If you want to change your life experience, be willing to keep taking action in the direction of your goals. Life is full of hills and valleys. It can be pretty challenging to keep taking action when things get rough. Quitting will not get you where you want to go. Only action can do that. Are you taking action to create the life you want?

3) Get emotionally involved in your life. Be passionate about what you are doing and know why you are doing it. Wrap yourself around your dreams and desires. Get excited about transforming your dreams into reality. Take time to experience the energy that comes from a passionate pursuit of your desires. This is your life we are talking about, it’s not a movie. To experience life to the full you must stay engaged. Are you truly involved in your life?

4) Set and pursue worthwhile goals that you truly believe in. Always have something positive ahead of you. Something you can look forward to, work toward, and hope for. Turn your dreams into goals and your goals into projects. Life is a journey and the goals you set determine the direction of that journey. Make your journey a worthwhile one by pursuing the goals, and doing the things, that you really believe in. Does your life include these meaningful pursuits?

5) Believe in yourself and have confidence in your success. Your feelings, attitudes and behavior all grow from your beliefs. If you believe that you can, you probably can. Belief builds confidence and confidence leads to action. Don’t impose limits on your own abilities by holding limiting beliefs and making negative predictions. Deep down, you know you can do whatever you set your mind on, so hold onto that belief. Do your actions show that you truly believe in yourself?

6) Maintain a clear mental picture of your intended results. Focus is the power plant of achievement. Take time to visualize your desired outcome daily, see it as real and focus on what you see. Your brain will accept your vision as reality if you continue to maintain your focus. Once that happens, your life will literally rearrange itself around that perceived reality. Your focus defines the course of your life. Be sure you are focusing in the direction you want your life to go. Are you?

7) Give yourself unconditional approval for all of the above. The need for approval is at the very core of everything we do. Approval from outside sources is encouraging, but it is absolutely vital that you approve of yourself. Do not make this contingent on your accomplishments. You need to approve of yourself as a person aside from your accomplishments. Allow yourself to give unconditional approval to “you” as a worthwhile and valuable person. Approval is at the heart of a healthy self-esteem. Have you given yourself the approval you deserve?

note: Keep in mind that we are all a work in progress. That means that there will always be room for improvement. That is why they call it personal development, because it’s a process of continual improvement. The important thing is to do the best we can so that we keep our life moving in the right direction.

Is there more?

Of course there is, but these 7 fundamental personal development truths will serve you well on your journey through life. They are the foundation of a meaningful and productive life experience. Practice these and I guarantee that you will always be way ahead of the curve.

How did your self-examination go?
Do you have something to add to the list?
The lines are open!

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When you think of personal development, what comes to your mind? The dictionary likens the process of personal development to personal change, growth, progress, advancement, and improvement. It’s an evolutionary process toward personal excellence or a state of being outstanding. It’s the opposite of settling for mediocrity.

I invite you to look around. Tell me, which do you see more of, mediocrity or excellence? Now, ask yourself this, “which do I want to be, mediocre or outstanding?”

What are your personal expectations?

It’s not really important what others expect from you. What really matters is what you expect from yourself. Personal development is, after all, a personal pursuit. For some people such a pursuit is just not worth the effort. That’s fine, because life is not a contest.

Others, myself included, expect much more of themselves. For people like us, the whole point of the “school of life,” is to learn how to be the best possible version of ourselves. Not that anyone will actually achieve excellence in the ultimate sense. Rather, it’s the process of continued personal development that we seek. It’s about the journey. Is that how you feel?

Are you on a personal development quest?

Are you constantly looking for ways to make subtle improvements in your life? When you discover some new way to improve your thinking or perception, are you quick to apply what you’ve learned? When you compare where you are today to where you were a year or two ago, can you see improvement?

In all likelihood, that’s exactly the kind of person you are. Why do I say that? Because you’re here. The only reason people read this blog is because they have a progressive attitude toward personal growth. That being the case, I have a question for you. What areas of your life would you like to focus on improving?

Targeting specific areas for improvement

There are several reasons why it’s important to identify a specific areas in your life that you want to focus on improving. First of all, personal development does not happen by accident. In order to improve in some areas of your life, you first need to identify what that area is.

The field of personal development takes in a lot of territory. It’s much easier to make noticeable progress by concentrating your efforts on only a few select areas. A key ingredient to success is focus, which requires that you purposely limit your efforts to these select areas. Once you identify these areas and give them special priority, you automatically prime yourself for success.

Let’s work together toward your personal development

My goal is to help you to quickly transform the quality of your life in the areas that matter most to you. To accomplish that, I need to know what areas are of greatest concern to you personally. I started Advanced Life Skills specifically for this purpose. Obviously, the more input I get from you the easier it is for me to provide the information you need.

It’s easy for me to continue to write articles about subjects that I’m interested in, but there’s no guarantee that I’ll cover the information that matters most to you. I can do keyword research to find subjects that rank well in Google, but that’s not my main objective. My main objective is to add value to your life.

Help me help you!

Today, I am appealing to you to share your greatest concerns, so that I can be of assistance. I really want to focus on the information that’s truly important to you. Advanced Life Skills is founded on the concept of sharing. Sharing is a two-way street. When you take the time to share your concerns with me, it puts me in a much better position to share real world solutions with you.

There are two ways you can do this. One way is to talk about what subjects you would like to see addressed by leaving a comment below. The other way is to use the contact form to send me a private message. If you don’t feel comfortable sharing your concerns in a comment, please feel free to contact me directly.

We are a personal development community

We all benefit from a mutual exchange of thoughts and ideas. I want Advanced Life Skills to be a valuable resource for your personal development journey, not just another self-improvement blog. Your feedback, opinions, insights, and expressions mean a great deal to me.

Please accept my invitation to work together, so that we can be a true, interactive, personal development community.

What area of personal development is your top priority?
What kind of personal development articles do you enjoy?
The lines are open and you have my attention!

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Have you noticed that we live in a culture that seems to prefer flash over substance?  Sadly, this mentality has also crept into the field of personal growth and development.

Personally, I do not believe in a shallow, one-dimensional approach to personal growth.  The whole concept of Advanced Life Skills was created specifically to provide the means for a personal evolution that begins deep inside, on a core level.  This is where true personal development starts.

Your priorities really matter

There are dozens of techniques aimed solely at attracting wealth and achieving your goals.  I have no problem at all with such pursuits. In fact, I often cover those areas in my articles. What I do have a problem with is any method that promotes the misconception that those things will give you a life of joy and satisfaction.

Wealth and success are important but they represent the flash of personal development not the substance.  Instead of commanding your main focus, such things should be viewed as the natural byproduct of positive changes that occur internally. By definition personal development is about you as a person.

Focus on internal peace and harmony

From my experience, it doesn’t really seem to matter where people are socially, economically or physically.  Most people do not feel truly satisfied with their life. Without realizing it, much of the problem is the result of focusing in the wrong direction.

If you focus on the things that contribute to your internal sense of peace and harmony your world will change automatically.  The more ‘in tune’ you are with your true values, passions and motives, the easier it is to attract good things into your life and live in a state of personal excellence.

Choose substance over flash

Happiness is more desirable than wealth.  Relationships are of greater value than a career.  And a sense of purpose is more satisfying than secular achievement.  Focus on those and the rest will unfold naturally.

I like money as much as the next guy.  But I also realize that money only solves financial problems.  Please believe me when I tell you that there is no shortage of unhappy rich people.  I know this because I have worked with a lot of them in my coaching practice.

Many of these people bought into the illusion that once they acquired enough money their life would be happy and rewarding.  Consequently, the attainment of wealth is often a hollow victory. True happiness comes from inside.  It comes from a deep sense of inner peace and harmony.

Don’t settle for a life of trade offs

Another popular misconception is the idea of scarcity.  Life does not need to be a trade-off. The expression, “that’s the price you pay” is often used with reference to someone who sacrifices their family life in pursuit of a lucrative career.  This implies that you need to choose between the two because you cannot have both.  This is simply not true.

Losing everything that really matters to you is not the price you pay for making money.  It is however the price that many have paid for choosing to put financial growth ahead of personal growth.

Creating value opens the door to abundance

As our own awareness and appreciation grows we begin to see that creating value is the fastest path to greater happiness.  If you want better relationships, then you should look for ways to add value to the relationships you have.  If you want a greater emotional or financial return from any endeavor, learn to contribute more value to it. If you want to grow toward personal excellence, you need to identify and live in harmony with your true values.

Once you embrace the idea of giving, you become connected with the flow of abundance all around you. Giving is a very powerful and often overlooked way to bring both happiness and abundance into your life. This is one of the seven steps covered in my book TRUE SELF.

But what if…

Maybe you don’t feel that you are in a position to create value.  Maybe you don’t feel very valuable.  Let me assure you, the problem is not a lack of value because you are extremely valuable. It’s just that you are not yet fully in touch with your true value. There are specific exercises in TRUE SELF to help you discover your real value and unlock your potential to contribute.

TRUE SELF is designed to teach you specific life skills that you can put to work in your life immediately.  These are skills that will enable you to begin transforming the quality of your life right now. Bottom line – I don’t want you to settle for ordinary, you deserve extraordinary!

Why not make this year THE YEAR

What possible reason could someone have for turning their back on simple adjustments with the power to enrich the mental, emotional, physical and financial quality of their life experience?  And yet, for some reason many people choose to settle for the life they’ve been handed rather than create one they truly desire.

My personal goal and the motivation behind this blog and my book, is to create true and lasting value for everyone involved.  The more you learn and incorporate these skills into your thinking process, the more you will experience an increase in the quality of your life.

Rest assured, a life of personal excellence is not an impossible dream.  It’s really a simple matter of learning and applying Advanced Life Skills.

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