Fear is something we have all experienced at one time or another. Some people are so wrapped up in fear that they live in a constant state of paranoia. Others seem to experience very little fearful influence in their lives. What influences which side of the fear fence we are on?

I’ve always been fascinated by the subject of fear. On occasion, I’ve also been surprised by my own reaction to it. I’ve come to appreciate that there are different kinds of fear that serve different purposes and come from different sources. Some are healthy and some are not.

Should you fear a bear in the woods?

When I first moved to the forest, I knew that sooner or later I would encounter a bear. I played this scenario out in my mind and was convinced that when it happened, I would be able to put any fearful feelings out of the picture and make the most of the experience. I envisioned myself face-to-face with this bear in a state of peaceful coexistence and unspoken communication. And then, one day….

I was helping a neighbor run a fence line near a ridge on a steep hillside. We had just sat down on the uphill side of the fence for a water break. Up the hill just behind me I heard a rustling and turned around to see what it was. Suddenly, I saw this huge black face appear from out of nowhere. It looked right at me. He was close, very close, and it really caught me off guard.

Before I tell you what happened next, I invite you to stop for a minute and imagine yourself in this situation. This big bear is so close that with one leap he could be on you. How would you respond? Do you think you would be afraid?

To fear or not to fear, there was no question!

The next few seconds happened on automatic pilot. Whatever plans I had made for this encounter ceased to matter. Somehow, I had vaulted over the fence and was probably fifty feet away before I even realized I was moving. I thought: “What are you doing, this is the moment you’ve been waiting for.” I turned around to see that poor startled bear running as fast as he could in the opposite direction.

I was surprised and a little disappointed by what had just happened. Instead of some zen like moment of oneness with a wild beast, I had been transported through time and space by the power of adrenaline, and evidently, so had the bear. I wondered, was this a victory for fear? My answer would come soon enough.

Another surprise was waiting

In those days there were a lot more rattlesnakes around and I had heard the ominous sound of the timber rattler many times. I figured it was just their way of helping us respect each others space.

One day while walking through the forest I was caught in mid-step by that disruptive rattling sound. I glanced down and realized that I was about to step directly on a coiled timber rattler. Time froze and once again I was transported by the mysterious power of adrenaline to a position of safety several yards behind the danger zone.

Sometimes fear is your friend

I immediately begun to see my encounter with the bear in a different light. These two experiences had triggered a reaction that was hardwired into my genes. I know that there are those who handle poisonous snakes and commune with bears in more controlled settings, but this was not the same!

These were surprise encounters in which my genetic programming kicked into survival mode. Genetic wisdom had taken complete control of my mind and body, exactly as it was designed to do. In most cases, any attempt to override this built in safety program would result in dire consequences. Sometimes, fear is your best friend.

Not all fear is the same

During my first summer in the forest I had no plumbing. When I got tired of bathing in creeks and rivers I would go to a nearby campground and pay for a nice long hot shower. On one such trip I met two women from New York City who were camping. When they learning that I lived in the forest, one of them said that she thought I must be very brave for living that way.

Surprised, I said “let me get this straight, you live in New York City, right?” She confirmed. I assured her that they were both much braver than I was. While she saw the city as a place of security, my perception was exactly the opposite. To me, big cities represented danger and the forest represented safety. This brings us to a second kind of fear.

Perceptual fear

Perceptual fear has to do with how we anchor our experiences, real or imagined. While perceptual fear may feel like it’s hardwired into our nervous system, it is actually based on emotional choices we make consciously and subconsciously.

We all have some degree of perceptual fear and just like its instinctual counterpart, it can serve as a protection. A good example is when we stand too close to the edge of a cliff and we get butterflies in our stomach. That can be a protection.

Being emotionally based, perpetual fear can also lead us in some unhealthy directions. Things like prejudice, mob mentality, panic, paranoia, limiting beliefs, and a wide variety of phobias are closely related to this kind of fear. Perceptual fear is based in insecurity and can easily get out of control.

Stop feeding the beast

Clearly, all fears are not the same. In an emergency situation our response may be instinctive and automatic. But the destructive fears that plague people today are not beyond our control. Perceptual type fears are contagious and are often perpetuated by propaganda. Constant exposure to sensationalized bad news reports is a perfect example.

Movies, TV shows, and computer games that focus on crime and violence send powerful messages to our subconscious. Perceptual fear is on the increase and much of it is self-induced. It’s difficult to feel secure in a war zone and yet many people are choosing exposure to that same kind of negative energy. You can’t feel happy and secure on a diet of fear and violence.

Choose fearless

I invite you to take a close look at what you are feeding your mind. There is an emotional price to pay for embracing fear based entertainment in any form. No one is immune to the images, sounds, people, and thoughts they are consistently exposed to. That means that we all have the ability and the opportunity to influence our perception.

If we choose to surround ourselves with positive energy, that is what we will reflect. We tend to see ourselves reflected in the world around us. If we are fostering fear, the world will look more fearful. On the other hand, if our reality is built around positive energy, that is what our world will reflect back at us. When it comes to perception, we always have a choice. Yes, we can even choose to be perceptually fearless.

During my life in the rainforests of Queensland, Australia, I learned that a smart person has to live in Survival Mode. You might think this means that I lived in a constant state of fear, always awaiting the next deadly danger.

That is how I initially lived, terrified of poisonous snakes, ticks, sea snakes, jellyfish, and dangerous crocodiles, sharks, stinging trees and more. I lived in a perpetual state of fear until I educated myself about the creatures I lived with.

Editors Note: This is a guest post by Robin Easton of Naked In Eden

I learned their territories, habits and needs. Once I better understood them I was able to give them the space and the response they needed, as well as know where I would most likely encounter them. The more I learned about these potentially deadly creatures the more aware and relaxed I became and the higher my ability to survive rose. I could choose how to most appropriately respond.  

It’s not about fear

Living in Survival Mode does not mean living in fear. In fact, it means quite the opposite. It simply means living with awareness. There is a distinct difference between living in Fear Mode and living in Awareness Mode. Those first few months in the rainforest my fear and lack of knowledge about the rainforest’s potentially deadly creatures, made me completely blind and vulnerable. My fear and denial of its existence actually increased my risk of death.

I knew nothing about the creatures I feared only that I feared dying from a poisonous snake bite, an unseen paralysis tick or a poisonous jellyfish. Not only did my fear and denial make me vulnerable, but it made me react in chaotic and unpredictable ways that frightened the dangerous snakes and creatures around me. My fear made them easily alarmed as they had no idea how I might react and whether or not I would harm them.

Denial, a close relative to fear

There’s another mode of living that’s related to Fear Mode. Some people spend their entire lives living in Denial Mode. Most of us have experienced this at one time or another. When we live in Denial Mode we are not only living in fear, but we attempt to push away or block all that frightens and overwhelms us, anything that might force us from our comfort zones.

So if a comfort zone is comfortable, why not just live there? Many of us do. Whole cultures of people live in a comfort zone. We watch TV, read endless books, make money and shop. “Things” become the focus of our daily lives. We often eat whatever we want without concern for the effects on our bodies, other species or the land. We simply eat what is easy and feeds our gnawing huger, which can be much like an endless addiction.

The benefits of awareness

Now, in Awareness Mode we may feel overwhelmed or fearful, but we never turn our backs on fear. We look at it head-on, keep an open mind and deal with it practically. We educate ourselves and learn to know what we fear and why we fear it. Even when we don’t fully understand our fear we are willing to at least explore that which we fear.

Eventually we are able to separate those fears which are potentially real from those fears which we “feel as real” but may have no basis in our present life. And we no longer deny the existence of the real fears. Instead we learn to take the necessary steps to protect ourselves so that we can remain strong, healthy, aware and alive.

It’s time for a change

I believe it speaks directly to the present emotional state of my culture (and many other cultures) in that we currently live in Denial and Fear Mode on nearly every level of our busyness. As we pollute almost all of our water, air, soil, food and space on the planet we are being called to shift from Denial and Fear into Awareness and Survival. Our very survival as a species might depend on this shift.

This is why I call it Survival Mode. When we live in Fear Mode we often make irrational and reactionary choices, choices that are not based on a solid foundation of clear thinking, knowledge and calm knowing of what we are dealing with. In Fear Mode we see only our fear. In Denial Mode we don’t see much at all.

When we are not living in awareness we are at our greatest risk in terms of survival, as individuals and as a species. When we cover our eyes and don’t want to “see” we risk our health, our children’s health and the health of the planet.

Robin Easton is an author, speaker, environmentalist,
nature photographer, musician and adventurer. She is
currently readying here book, Naked in Eden, for pub-
lication in fall 2010. It is a story based on her life
in the Australian rainforest. Her fascinating story has
been told on an award-winning NBC News affiliate piece,
Paul Harvey News, CNN, KBLA Radio, KSFR and others.
She's appeared in magazines and newspapers throughout
the U.S.A. and Canada. You can learn more about Robin
and her work by visiting her blog Naked In Eden.

Have you ever wondered where fear comes from? Most people feel some sort of fear on a regular basis, but it’s rare that anyone questions the source of that fear. Since fear wears so many different faces, is it possible for all fear to come from the same source?

Before we look at the actual source of fear, let’s talk about three of the more common broad categories of fear. I think you will find that most fears fit into one of these general categories:

Impending danger. This is the fear associated with the “fight or flight” response. Much of what happens in the face of impending danger is automatic. That doesn’t mean that we all respond the same way, not by a long shot. Just that our response in the face of real impending danger is usually dictated by our own unique emotional reflex. Some will feel paralyzed by the fear, while others will take flight. But whatever the response, it tends to be automatic.

Unexpected tragedy or loss. When we are forced to face unpleasant situations, it can easily trigger feelings of fear. This often happens in the face of loss or tragedy. It might be the loss of a job, a loved one, or an opportunity we were depending on. It could also be a serious disease or accident. Whenever circumstances take an unexpected and unwelcome turn, we can easily see things in a fearful light.

Uncertainty, the what if syndrome. This is the broadest category and it includes many of the most common types of fear. For example: fear of failure, fear of loss (not the same as actual loss), fear of rejection, fear of embarrassment, fear of loneliness, fear of disease, and so on. This category is unique because none of the huge variety of fears included in it are based on existing realities. Instead, they are the result of dwelling on a possible negative outcome. They are all based on an imaginary “what if.”  

A common source?

Realizing that fears come in such a wide variety, it might seem unlikely that they could all stem from on e common source. Especially considering that some are based on real situations, while others are nothing more than figments of our imaginations.

Well, as unlikely as it might seem, all fear is based on one core emotion. In fact, it is the granddaddy of all human emotions. What is it? It is the inherent and insatiable desire to feel safe and secure. Anything that threatens that sense of security creates feelings of insecurity, and all fear is based on insecurity.

Real or imagined, it doesn’t matter

Let’s go back and identify how insecurity is involved in our three categories of fear. When it comes to impending danger, on an emotional level we feel like our very existence is being threatened. The “impending” aspect means there is a strong sense of urgency involved. This is why we tend to react automatically. It’s programmed into our survival instinct. Our sense of security is directly linked to our survival instinct on the deepest level.

Tragedy and loss rock the very foundations of our world. Our sense of security is deeply rooted in our physical wellbeing and our close relationships with loved ones. Any threat or loss in these areas triggers a corresponding sense of insecurity.

Uncertainty has a different relationship with our sense of security than the other two categories. Fears included in this category are an expression of an existing sense of insecurity that is being projected into the future. If you want to reduce the level of fear in your life, this is the place to start.

Dealing with the “what if syndrome”

Changing the way we deal with impending danger or tragedy is very involved. These are either major emotional events that involve a healing process, or sudden, unexpected situations. However, most of the crippling effects of fear that limit people on a daily basis fall under the heading of uncertainty.

There are an almost limitless host of emotional conditions that depend on the what if syndrome for their existence. Anxiety is one of the more prevalent. Even depression is often based on a sense of hopelessness about the future. Changing the emotional anchors we attach to our perception of the future can work wonders.

Negative thoughts produce negative results

What if syndrome is a negative mindset being expressed in a future tense. Since the mind is only creative, this is an extremely dangerous way to project your energy. It can easily become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

This is true even if your thoughts are something like “I hope I don’t… (lose my job, get cancer, spend the rest of my life alone,etc).” What you are really projecting is “I’m afraid I might…” So, right away your creative mind goes to work looking for a way to manifest the very result you are fearful of.

Change your focus, change your outcome

The obvious solution here is to stop projecting fear into your future. I suggest a twofold approach. First, you need to shift your focus in a more productive direction. Additionally, it’s a good idea to identify things that encourage feelings of insecurity and eliminate them from your life. This second step can have a huge impact on your overall outlook.

Replace negativity with curiosity

What’s so great about curiosity? Several things! It allows for many possibilities without trying to dictate or force an outcome. Curiosity is almost emotionally neutral, leaning slightly to the positive. And curiosity is inquisitive instead of judgmental.

The ability to view life as a journey is greatly enhanced by a curious nature. This mindset allows life to unfold naturally. Once we are comfortable with the unfolding nature of life, we begin to feel secure in the process. Change becomes something to embrace, rather than something to fear.

Reduce your exposure to negative input

What do you gain by watching distorted sensationalism on the nightly news? How is your outlook improved by long conversations that focus on problems you can’t do anything about? How does listening to chronic complainers and fault finders help you adopt a less fearful mindset?

Constant exposure to these things will only make you feel less secure about your life and your future, why go there? I’m not suggesting that you hide your head in the sand. I am simply saying that being bombarded by negativity will increase your feelings of insecurity and fear.

Get over the “what if syndrome”

Most of the things people tend to worry about never happen. And, even if they do, worrying about them never helps. It just robs you of your joy and fills you with fear. Truth is, most fear is nothing more than a figment of our imaginations. It’s an expression of insecurity based on pointless speculation.

In other words, most of the time “there is nothing to fear but fear itself.” Do yourself a giant favor, let it go!

What makes you feel fearful?
How do you keep fear in check?
The lines are open!

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When you think of Oregon you naturally think of trees, right? Where I live there are trees for as far as the eye can see. In fact, I am literally surrounded by millions of acres of forest.
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As you can imagine, summer thunder storms that bring lightning to the region are a matter of concern. Almost without exception, forest fires are caused by lightning strikes. Some people live with the threat of earthquakes or hurricanes. For us, it’s lightning.
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A burning example
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Consider the Biscuit Fire which took place in the summer of 2002. Before it was over, this ravenous wildfire had burned nearly half a million acres of the pristine Siskiyou National Forest of Oregon and Northern California.
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That was an edgy time for us. We could see the actual flames from our home and we were on 30 minute evacuation alert status for about three weeks. It’s impossible to describe the magnitude or intensity of this raging beast as it consumed everything in it’s path. Suffice it to say, it was truly fear inspiring.
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There is no way to prevent lightning
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There are many potential threats in life that we can avoid by taking preventative measures. However, a major force like lightning does not fit into this category. There is nothing we can do to alter it’s course even slightly, let alone prevent it.
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It is estimated that, on average, over the entire earth’s surface, lightning strikes approximately 100 times per second. Since this is something that can’t be altered, what options do we have?
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Deal with it effectively
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When something can’t be prevented, the next best thing is to deal with it swiftly and effectively. This is precisely why the Biscuit Fire was so devastating. It was allowed to burn unchecked until it was too late.
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There was a time when strategically placed lookout towers were manned by fire watchmen all summer long. As soon as a fire started, they notified the smoke jumpers. These fire fighting “hot shots” would be dispatched by helicopter within minutes. They dealt with the problem before it got out of control. Their swift response minimized the potentially serious threat.
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* Side note: For some reason, the powers that be closed the smoke jumpers base and stopped using lookouts prior to the Biscuit Fire.
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When lightning strikes your world  
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Now the odds that you or I will be struck by actual lightning during our lifetime are only about 1 in 5000. But what are the odds that we will experience some potentially devastating, unpreventable event?
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The fact that we all carry various kinds of insurance pretty well answers that question. Insurance companies make billions every year because people recognize that unforeseen occurrences befall us all. It’s one of the ways we try to prepare for things that we can’t control.
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When bad things happen
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Bad stuff happens, and sometimes there is nothing you could have done to prevent it. The next best thing you can do is to respond like a smoke jumper. Act swiftly to minimize the problem before it gets out of control.
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I realize that this sounds like painfully obvious advice. Our logical mind says: “hey, tell me something I don’t know.” But here’s the problem, when unforeseen occurrences strike, we are usually caught off guard. In situations like that, we tend to respond emotionally, not logically.
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Take a look around
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How many people do you know who use denial as a coping mechanism? All this does is allow a bad situation to get even worse. How many others allow fear to stop them from taking action that could minimize their pain and suffering? Fear and denial only multiply problems, they never help.
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Reality is your friend, especially in a threatening situation. But this concept is also true when it comes to preventable problems. Consider the relationship that slowly grows cold because no one was willing to talk about “the problems” until it was too late. How about the minor health issues that set the stage for major health problems because someone was in denial.
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Be honest with yourself, you deserve it
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Whether it’s a personal lightning strike or a slow burn, an honest assessment of the situation followed be swift action is always the best course. Sometimes, the hardest person to be honest with is ourselves. Ironically, this is the foundation of all personal growth. The first personal development skill we need to master is self-honesty.
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Admittedly, this kind of honesty will sometimes reveal challenges that we wish didn’t exist. When that happens we should view it as an opportunity for growth. Once exposed, we can minimize the problem by dealing with it swiftly and effectively.
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7 Ways to minimize an adverse situation
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1) Take preventative measures whenever possible.
2) Accept the fact that bad thing do happen to good people.
3) Act swiftly to minimize the problem before it gets out of control.
4) Never use denial as a coping mechanism.
5) Don’t let fear stop you from taking action.
6) Be honest with yourself when making an assessment.
7) View every challenge as an opportunity for growth.
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Life will continue to challenge you
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Interestingly, there are many benefits to lightning. In the bigger picture, life on earth actually requires lightening. Did you realize that without thunderstorms and lightning, the earth-atmosphere electrical balance would disappear in 5 minutes.
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The journey of life has its ups and down, and sometimes we get hit by lightning. No one said it would be without challenges. In the bigger picture though, it’s often our greatest challenges that teach the most valuable lessons. Happily, life is also full of wonderful experiences and opportunities. We can let fear and denial rob us of our joy, or we can embrace the wonderment of it all.
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How do you deal when bad things happen?
Do you find self-honesty challenging?
The lines are open!
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Free updates via RSS feed or email
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Related Articles:
Don’t Let Fear Get In Your Way
Life Skills and The Fear Factor
Fear – The Motivation Destroyer
How to Deal With Your Hidden Fears
First Comes the Fear Then the Blessing

Most people have areas in their lives where they would like to make some improvements.  Is that true of you?  Would you like to be in better shape physically, emotionally, mentally, or financially?

That’s a lot of territory, I know.  Perhaps you would like to make some positive changes in all those areas.  Well, you are certainly not alone.  I think all of us feel we have room for improvement in all those areas of life, I certainly do.

So what’s the problem?

If we see things in our life that we want to change, then what is stopping us?  Why don’t we just make the desired changes?  Questions like that can sure give birth to a huge list of excuses, can’t they?

If someone says to us, why haven’t you lost the weight, or read those books, or made more money, or learned to control your temper?  We can easily defend ourselves with a long list of reasons that sound perfectly logical.  Why do we feel the need to make excuses for our behavior? 

Because we like to justify ourselves!

It’s not something we do just for the benefit of others.  We like to justify ourselves to ourselves, so we can feel comfortable about who we are and why we act the way we do.

Making changes comes with a whole assortment of emotional issues that most of us would rather not deal with.  It means that we would have to disrupt our routine. It also means that some sort of effort will probably be required.  If we already have too much to do, and more than enough to think about, the last thing we want is one more demand put on us.

Can you relate to feeling that way?

Feeling overwhelmed means that we want to dial things down and restore some balance. The last thing we want to do is to take on one more project. AND YET…

We still feel that inner desire to make improvements.  We know that life could be better on so many levels, and that is what we truly want.  So where does that leave us? Well, it leaves us wanting to change, and holding ourselves back at the same time.  This dilemma actually adds to our discomfort because it creates internal conflict and disharmony.

Let’s look and three things they can stop us from making changes in our life, and then we will consider three ways to deal with the situation.

1) Complacency.  The truth is that complacency has many faces and all of them create barriers to progress.  Whether it’s laziness, lack of interest, lack of motivation, inability to stick with it, procrastination, or indecision, they all add up to the same thing.  Nothing changes because in our mind, the changes we desire are not yet important enough to move us to action.

The other possibility is that, we may be waiting for some kind of miracle.  Perhaps thinking that our lives will change when we win the lottery, or when someone comes along and does all the work for us.  If this describes you, please read the following article: Don’t Count On Your Fairy Godmother

2) Fear.  Fear also has many faces.  It could be fear of failure, fear of change, fear of commitment, or even fear of success.  Fear is the most powerful reason there is to move away from something.  When we harbor fear, we will do almost anything to avoid this situation associated with that fear.  It really doesn’t matter what kind of fear it is, if we have linked taking action to fear, and inaction to security and comfort, we will not act.

The power of fear increases with proximity.  For example, with fear of success, the closer we get to actually succeeding the more fear influences our decisions and actions.  All limiting beliefs are based on fear in one form or another.  For a more in depth look at limiting beliefs I encourage you to read this: Self Sabotage

3) Confusion.  In this age of information overload confusion is an ever increasing problem.  Too much information is just as paralyzing as a lack of information.  If you want to lose some weight for example, what do you do?

You will probably start by checking out all the various weight loss programs.  And what will you find?  You will find that there are too many experts, with too many ideas, and they all sound very convincing.  The trouble is they have so many conflicting opinions that you can’t figure out who to listen to or who to trust.  The more you check into it, the worse it gets.  Information overload can hold you back even when you are feeling motivated and fearless.

It’s a modern day paradox.  We have almost unlimited access to information on any topic, but sorting through it all can leave us more confused and frustrated than we were before we started.

I talk about this in more detail while explaining my reasons for creating the 7 Simple Steps program.  You can read more about the role of confusion here.

Now the question is what to do about it?

If we are stuck in the dilemma of wanting to make changes and feeling unable to do so, there are really only three basic alternatives.  Let’s consider them one at a time.

1) No action. The first way of dealing with this dilemma is to do nothing at all, and just live with the situation and the associated frustration.  This is the choice most people make.  Life seems overwhelming enough, and the thought of adding to it is just not acceptable.  Many who find themselves in this category will simply make themselves a strong drink at the end of the day, turn on the TV, and attempt to take a nightly vacation from life.  Even though many have chosen this approach, I think there are much better options.

2) Roll back. The second way of dealing with the situation is to simply abandon your desire for more, and just settle.  For most people who make this choice the internal dialog might be, “this is my life and there’s nothing I can do about it.”  Some would call this giving up, I call it acceptance.

There is nothing wrong with acceptance. In fact it can put you in a very powerful place.  It eliminates the desire for more, and finds pleasure in the present reality.  If you can let go of wanting to be more than you currently are, and find inner harmony in doing so, then this is the way to go.

In fact, combining acceptance was simplifying your life even further, is an extremely effective course. It can quickly make your life feel much less stressful, and much more rewarding at the same time.  There is a lot of wisdom in the old adage, less is more.

3) Go for it. The third way applies to those who are compelled to become the best they can possibly be in every area of life, and nothing else will do.  For those of us who feel this way, and I include myself in this group, we need a two sided approach.

We need to simplify our lives and let go of nonessential activities, so that we can create room for personal development pursuits.  Adding to an overcrowded schedule will not work and you probably already know that from experience.  Even the so called overachievers have limits that must be acknowledged.

So the first step is to figure out what to let go of.  Don’t say you can’t let go of anything.  If you want to ramp up the quality of your life you need to clear some room in your schedule, preferably an hour or two per day.

Next, you need to adopt a no-nonsense, step-by-step plan for making the changes you want to make.  Whatever it is that you want to accomplish, pick one approach and stick to it.  I don’t care if there are 10 choices that all sound really good, pick one and only one, and stick to it. Here’s a little inspiration to help you get started: 8 Steps for Acting on Inspiration

Don’t expect overnight miracles.  Whatever the nature of your pursuit, give it 30 days of consistent effort before you deviate from your chosen approach.  If you’ve chosen wisely, your approach will eventually produce results, but you need to give it time.

Now make a choice!

OK, it’s time for you to figure out what it is that’s holding you back, and what you want to do about it.  Let me know what you think, and what you have decided to do.

The lines are open…

Are you in touch with your fears, or have you hidden them in the dark recesses of your subconscious mind. We all harbor certain fears, and it can be an uncomfortable subject to pull out into the open.

Does it bother you to talk about your fears?

Do you ever feel like the only one with those feelings?

Everyone is afraid of something

At some point in time we have all allowed our fears to get the best of us. Lately, it seems that the economic uncertainty and it’s repercussions have become a breeding ground new feelings of fear and insecurity.

Because it is such a universal concern, I was thrilled to see this subject being addressed by Leo Babauta of Zen Habits. In his latest blog post titled: Conquer the Fears Lurking in the Dark Corners of Your Mind Leo provides some helpful insights and suggestions from his own personal experience.

Here’s an excerpt where he shines some light on the problem and offers some practical advice. This quote if under the subheading:

Bring the Fear Into the Light

“Fears have power over us not because they’re so horrible — even if some of them might be kinda bad — but because we allow them to hide in the darkness and intimidate us. We are paralyzed by these fears. As a great man once said, we have nothing to fear … but fear itself.

The solution: shine some light on the fear.

The answer to the problem of darkness has always been light. Bring the fear into the daylight, and it won’t be so powerful.

Sure, the problem will still exist, and it may be a difficult problem. You’ll still have that debt to deal with — but it will simply be a matter of cutting back on some expenses so you can make bi-weekly payments on your debts, until they’re eliminated. That’s not so terrible when you think of it that way — a series of actions that needs to be taken. More on this in the next section.

So you have to start by shining some light on your fear — and do this by sitting down and thinking about the problem. Write it out. Make a list. If it’s debt, write down all your debts and get the amounts owed. If it’s health, write down exactly what your health problems are, in detail. It may seem silly to write down problems, but this is how you shine the light on them: by taking a look at them.

If you have problems even taking a look at the problem, ask yourself this question: what’s the worst thing that could happen?

Often it’s not that bad. If it’s debt, the worst is that you’d have a large debt to pay off, and it would take a long time. Or maybe that you’d have to file for bankruptcy — which isn’t as bad as you might think. I’ve had relatives that filed for bankruptcy, and — gasp — they are living normal lives right now.

If the worst-case scenario really is bad, seek help. Talk to someone about it — a friend or family member, or someone online even. This is another good way to shine some light on the problem — share it with someone else”

Don’t Let Fear Get In Your Way

Fear comes in all shapes and sizes, when left unchecked it can put a stranglehold on our lives and relationships. Clearly, leaving fear alone does not mean that it will leave you alone. Better to deal with it.

If you have found yourself experiencing increased fear and uncertainty, I want to encourage you to read the rest Leo’s insightful article.

You will also benefit from these related articles:

6 Keys to Overcome Fear and Doubt
Life Skills and The Fear Factor
Release the Fear to Get Motivated

Fear can have a paralyzing effect on your life, and it can surface when you least expect it. A life of true happiness and security is only possible if we have the courage to face our fears and overcome them. I hope this information has been helpful.

Let me know what you thought, and feel free to mention
your fears and tell us what helps you to deal with them.

Why is it so easy to let fear stand between us and our dreams? You know how it works. First we think of something that we really want to do or accomplish. Then we start to list all the great benefits this new venture will bring into our lives. And just when we are really getting into it, some part of our mind comes up with, “yeah but, if we do that then…”

You know what follows, a list of negative possibilities designed to throw a wet blanket over our great idea. And what do we call that wet blanket? We call it a reality check, but is that accurate?

Why do we repackage fear and call it reality?

We do it because calling it reality makes our hopes and dreams seem like fantasies, and saves us from having to face our fears. Or, put another way, we do it because we are afraid.

So what are we afraid of?

Well, the list will vary depending on the situation, but some likely candidates are:

* Fear of the unknown
* Fear of risk
* Fear of failure
* Fear of ridicule
* Fear of change

Now, we only need one or two of these to dispense with minor aspirations. On the other hand, if we are trying to talk ourselves out of a major dream or goal, we may need to mobilize a small army of fears to get the job done. And how do we justify getting in our own way like that? Once again, we call it reality.

When we hide behind the term “reality” it makes us look reasonable instead of fearful. It’s like saying that any other choice is just plain foolishness, and now we can retreat back into the safety of our comfort zone without losing face.

Fear is a wall we build around ourselves.

Our own sense of insecurity makes us feel protected inside that wall, and so we find reasons to stay there, out of harms way. The problem is, we also wall ourselves off from all the wonderful opportunities and experiences that make life fun. Without risk there is no sense of adventure, no excitement, and no real passion.

Before we go any further, let’s acknowledge that a manageable amount of couscous apprehension (fear) is not a bad thing. Rushing into something new without taking the time to weigh the possible adverse consequences is not usually the course of wisdom. In fact a manageable amount of fear can often be transformed into excitement and motivation.

So the kind of fear we are concerned with, is the kind that limits our ability and willingness to reach for our dreams. Any form of fear that hinders our ability to act in the direction of our heartfelt desires is a serious handicap that needs to be addressed.

Fear causes us to trade it all for false security.

The hidden reason why fear can move us to compromise our goals and abandon our dreams is the fact that insecurity is the granddaddy of all limiting emotions. Every person on the planet has an inherent and insatiable desire to feel safe and secure. On a subconscious emotional level, we will naturally try to avoid anything perceived as a threat to our sense of security.

It’s important to realize that most of these negative emotional anchors are only perception , they have little to do with any real threat. Then again, life is perception, so to us they will be as real as we choose to make them.

Change your perception and the fear goes away.

The key to breaking down these walls, and vanishing the fear, is found in our ability to alter the way we perceive any situation, and the emotional anchors to attach to it. We don’t need to change reality, just our emotional interpretation of it.

This is where learning a few advanced life skills gives us total control over how we experience life. Have you ever wondered why some people embrace challenges that cause others to retreat to safety?

How can the same experience represent excitement to one person and paralyzing fear to another? We might be tempted to attribute the different to degrees of self-confidence, but where does self-confidence come from?

Self-confidence is what results when our perception is reinforced by our experiences. The thing to keep in mind is that our perception has a strong influence on our level of commitment, which often determines whether or not we succeed.

Face your fears, claim your blessings.

Many of life’s most meaningful rewards and blessings require that we successfully overcome some type of challenge or fear. Consider some common examples:

1) A meaningful relationship. All close relationships require a level of commitment that leaves us emotionally vulnerable. The more involved you are, the more openly exposed you become to emotional pain if something goes wrong. Some people consider the possibility (fear) of pain to be too great a risk, so they deny themselves the experience. To enjoy the rewards and blessings of a truly wonderful relationship, we must first overcome the fear.

2) A rewarding career. All business ventures involve the risk of loss. Sure, you do the research and try to make sound decisions, but even smart businesses fail. In fact, many ultra successful business people have lost it all at some point in their career, only to come back and surpass their previous best. Some people find this degree of risk unacceptable. Instead, they choose the the illusion of security provided by a job they don’t find satisfying, rather than risk the possibility of loss. Again, to enjoy the rewards of a successful business requires that you be willing to face, and then overcome, the fear of financial loss.

3) Personal growth. Making meaningful changes on a personal level requires that we be willing to make an honest evaluation of “self,” and then have the courage to try something new. At first, personal development may not seem to fit with the other two examples. The truth is, it actually epitomizes the fear and blessing scenario. When we are willing to say: “Hay, I’ve got a lot of room for improvement here, and I am willing to do something about it.” We put ourselves in a vulnerable position with the potential for unprecedented blessings. But it takes courage to move out of the comfort zone of what’s familiar, and move toward uncharted territory.

In the final analysis, the more willing you are to face your fears and go for it anyway, the more blessings you will enjoy. Learning to view challenges as adventures, and fear as excitement, will change the way you experience your life. Often, the greater the fear, the bigger the potential blessing.

The passion and exhilaration that make life a truly exceptional experience belong to those with the courage to overcome their fears, and reach for their dreams. So train yourself to look beyond your fears and see the rewards that courage will bring. Focus on the blessings, they are yours for the taking.

This is just me talking,
how do you feel about it?
The lines are open…

Anxiety is defined as a state of apprehension or fear resulting from the anticipation of a real or imagined threat, event, or situation. It is one of the most common human emotions experienced by people at some point in their lives.
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However, most people who have never experienced a panic attack, or extreme anxiety, fail to realize the terrifying nature of the experience. Extreme dizziness, blurred vision, tingling and feelings of breathlessness—and that’s just the tip of the iceberg!
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When these sensations occur and people do not understand why, they feel they have contracted an illness, or a serious mental condition. The threat of losing complete control seems very real and naturally very terrifying. Fight/Flight Response: One of the root causes of panic attacks?
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I am sure most of you have heard of the fight/flight response as an explanation for one of the root causes of panic attacks. Have you made the connection between this response and the unusual sensations you experience during and after a panic attack episode?
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Anxiety is a response to a danger or threat. It is so named because all of its effects are aimed toward either fighting or fleeing from the danger. Thus, the sole purpose of anxiety is to protect the individual from harm. This may seem ironic given that you no doubt feel your anxiety is actually causing you great harm…perhaps the most significant of all the causes of panic attacks.
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However, the anxiety that the fight/flight response created was vital in the daily survival of our ancient ancestors—when faced with some danger, an automatic response would take over that propelled them to take immediate action such as attack or run. Even in today’s hectic world, this is still a necessary mechanism. It comes in useful when you must respond to a real threat within a split second.
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Anxiety is a built-in mechanism to protect us from danger. Interestingly, it is a mechanism that protects but does not harm—an important point that will be elaborated upon later.
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The Physical Manifestations of a Panic Attack: Other pieces of the puzzle to understand the causes of panic attacks. Nervousness and Chemical Effects…When confronted with danger, the brain sends signals to a section of the nervous system. It is this system that is responsible for gearing the body up for action and also calms the body down and restores equilibrium. To carry out these two vital functions, the autonomic nervous system has two subsections, the sympathetic nervous system and the parasympathetic nervous system.
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Although I don’t want to become too “scientific,” having a basic understanding of the sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system will help you understand the causes of panic attacks.
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The sympathetic nervous system is the one we tend to know all too much about because it primes our body for action, readies us for the “fight or flight” response, while the parasympathetic nervous system is the one we love dearly as it serves as our restoring system, which returns the body to its normal state.
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When either of these systems is activated, they stimulate the whole body, which has an “all or nothing” effect. This explains why when a panic attack occurs the individual often feels a number of different sensations throughout the body.
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The sympathetic system is responsible for releasing the adrenaline from the adrenal glands on the kidneys. These are small glands located just above the kidneys. Less known, however, is that the adrenal glands also release adrenaline, which functions as the body’s chemical messengers to keep the activity going. When a panic attack begins, it does not switch off as easily as it is turned on. There is always a period of what would seem increased or continued anxiety, as these messengers travel throughout the body. Think of them as one of the physiological causes of panic attacks, if you will.
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After a period of time, the parasympathetic nervous system gets called into action. Its role is to return the body to normal functioning once the perceived danger is gone. The parasympathetic system is the system we all know and love, because it returns us to a calm relaxed state.
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When we engage in a coping strategy that we have learned, for example, a relaxation technique, we are in fact willing the parasympathetic nervous system into action. A good thing to remember is that this system will be brought into action at some stage whether we will it or not. The body cannot continue in an ever-increasing spiral of anxiety. It reaches a point where it simply must kick in, relaxing the body. This is one of the many built-in protection systems our bodies have for survival.
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You can do your best with worrying thoughts, keeping the sympathetic nervous system going, but eventually it stops. In time, it becomes a little smarter than us, and realizes that there really is no danger. Our bodies are incredibly intelligent—modern science is always discovering amazing patterns of intelligence that run throughout the cells of our body. Our body seems to have infinite ways of dealing with the most complicated array of functions we take for granted. Rest assured that your body’s primary goal is to keep you alive and well.
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Not so convinced?
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Try holding your breath for as long as you can. No matter how strong your mental will is, it can never override the will of the body. This is good news—no matter how hard you try to convince yourself that you are gong to die from a panic attack, you won’t. Your body will override that fear and search for a state of balance. There has never been a reported incident of someone dying from a panic attack.
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Remember this next time you have a panic attack; he causes of panic attacks cannot do you any physical harm. Your mind may make the sensations continue longer than the body intended, but eventually everything will return to a state of balance. In fact, balance (homeostasis) is what our body continually strives for.
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The interference for your body is nothing more than the sensations of doing rigorous exercise. Our body is not alarmed by these symptoms. Why should it be? It knows its own capability. It’s our thinking minds that panic, which overreact and scream in sheer terror! We tend to fear the worst and exaggerate our own sensations. A quickened heart beat becomes a heart attack. An overactive mind seems like a close shave with schizophrenia. Is it our fault? Not really—we are simply diagnosing from poor information.
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Cardiovascular Effects: Activity in the sympathetic nervous system increases our heartbeat rate, speeds up the blood flow throughout the body, ensures all areas are well supplied with oxygen and that waste products are removed. This happens in order to prime the body for action.
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A fascinating feature of the “fight or flight” mechanism is that blood (which is channeled from areas where it is currently not needed by a tightening of the blood vessels) is brought to areas where it is urgently needed. For example, should there be a physical attack, blood drains from the skin, fingers, and toes so that less blood is lost, and is moved to “active areas” such as the thighs and biceps to help the body prepare for action.
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This is why many feel numbness and tingling during a panic attack-often misinterpreted as some serious health risk-such as the precursor to a heart attack. Interestingly, most people who suffer from anxiety often feel they have heart problems. If you are really worried that such is the case with your situation, visit your doctor and have it checked out. At least then you can put your mind at rest.

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Respiratory Effects: One of the scariest effects of a panic attack is the fear of suffocating or smothering. It is very common during a panic attack to feel tightness in the chest and throat. I’m sure everyone can relate to some fear of losing control of your breathing. From personal experience, anxiety grows from the fear that your breathing itself would cease and you would be unable to recover. Can a panic attack stop our breathing? No.
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A panic attack is associated with an increase in the speed and depth of breathing. This has obvious importance for the defense of the body since the tissues need to get more oxygen to prepare for action. The feelings produced by this increase in breathing, however, can include breathlessness, hyperventilation, sensations of choking or smothering, and even pains or tightness in the chest. The real problem is that these sensations are alien to us, and they feel unnatural.
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Having experienced extreme panic attacks myself, I remember that on many occasions, I would have this feeling that I couldn’t trust my body to do the breathing for me, so I would have to manually take over and tell myself when to breathe in and when to breathe out. Of course, this didn’t suit my body’s requirement of oxygen and so the sensations would intensify—along with the anxiety. It was only when I employed the technique I will describe for you later, did I let the body continue doing what it does best—running the whole show.
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Importantly, a side effect of increased breathing (especially if no actual activity occurs) is that the blood supply to the head is actually decreased. While such a decrease is only a small amount and is not at all dangerous, it produces a variety of unpleasant but harmless symptoms that include dizziness, blurred vision, confusion, sense of unreality, and hot flushes.
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Other Physical Effects of Panic Attacks: Now that we’ve discussed some of the primary physiological causes of panic attacks, there are a number of other effects that are produced by the activation of the sympathetic nervous system, none of which are in any way harmful.
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For example, the pupils widen to let in more light, which may result in blurred vision, or “seeing” stars, etc. There is a decrease in salivation, resulting in dry mouth. There is decreased activity in the digestive system, which often produces nausea, a heavy feeling in the stomach, and even constipation. Finally, many of the muscle groups tense up in preparation for “fight or flight,” and this results in subjective feelings of tension, sometimes extending to actual aches and pains, as well as trembling and shaking.
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Overall, the fight/flight response results in a general activation of the whole bodily metabolism. Thus, one often feels hot and flushed and, because this process takes a lot of energy, the person generally feels tired and drained.
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Mental Manifestations: Are the causes of panic attacks all in my head? is a question many people wonder to themselves.
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The goal of the fight/flight response is making the individual aware of the potential danger that may be present. Therefore, when activated, the mental priority is placed upon searching the surroundings for potential threats. In this state one is highly-strung, so to speak. It is very difficult to concentrate on any one activity, as the mind has been trained to seek all potential threats and not to give up until the threat has been identified. As soon as the panic hits, many people look for the quick and easiest exit from their current surroundings, such as by simply leaving the bank queue and walking outside. Sometimes the anxiety can heighten, if we perceive that leaving will cause some sort of social embarrassment.
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If you have a panic attack while at the workplace but feel you must press on with whatever task it is you are doing, it is quite understandable that you would find it very hard to concentrate. It is quite common to become agitated and generally restless in such a situation. Many individuals I have worked with who have suffered from panic attacks over the years indicated that artificial light—such as that which comes from computer monitors and televisions screens—can be one of the causes of panic attacks by triggering them or worsen a panic attack, particularly if the person is feeling tired or run down.
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This is worth bearing in mind if you work for long periods of time on a computer. Regular break reminders should be set up on your computer to remind you to get up from the desk and get some fresh air when possible.
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In other situations, when during a panic attack an outside threat cannot normally be found, the mind turns inwards and begins to contemplate the possible illness the body or mind could be suffering from. This ranges from thinking it might have been something you ate at lunch, to the possibility of an oncoming cardiac arrest.
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The burning question is: Why is the fight/flight response activated during a panic attack even when there is apparently nothing to be frightened of?
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Upon closer examination of the causes of panic attacks, it would appear that what we are afraid of are the sensations themselves—we are afraid of the body losing control. These unexpected physical symptoms create the fear or panic that something is terribly wrong. Why do you experience the physical symptoms of the fight/flight response if you are not frightened to begin with? There are many ways these symptoms can manifest themselves, not just through fear.
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For example, it may be that you have become generally stressed for some reason in your life, and this stress results in an increase in the production of adrenaline and other chemicals, which from time to time, would produce symptoms….and which you perceive as the causes of panic attacks.
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This increased adrenaline can be maintained chemically in the body, even after the stress has long gone. Another possibility is diet, which directly affects our level of stress. Excess caffeine, alcohol, or sugar is known for causing stress in the body, and is believed to be one of the contributing factors of the causes of panic attacks.
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Unresolved emotions are often pointed to as possible trigger of panic attacks, but it is important to point out that eliminating panic attacks from your life does not necessarily mean analyzing your psyche and digging into your subconscious. The “One Move” technique will teach you to deal with the present moment and defuse the attack along with removing the underlying anxiety that sparks the initial anxiety. © Joe Berry
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Learn more Joe Barry is the author of this article and an international panic disorder coach. His informative site on all issues related to panic and anxiety attacks can be found here: http://www.panicportal.com 
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Jonathan comments: Joe Berry’s success in dealing with all forms of Anxiety Disorder is very impressive. If you or a loved one struggles with anxiety I hope this information is helpful. Please leave your comments. 

Are you in touch with your fears, or does it bother you to talk about it? Everyone is afraid of something and sometimes our own fears can get the best of us. Did you realize that there are just as many people who are afraid of succeeding, as there are who are afraid of failing?  Some are afraid of both!
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This article includes five ways to help you overcome your fears, whatever they may be, so they don’t get in you way. It’s a called…
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Five Great Ways to Conquer Your Fears

Editor’s note: This is a guest post written for zenabits
by Doug Heacock of Underpants Office.

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It is a rare person who lives without fear of one kind or another.  You may fear heights, or spiders, or new situations, or rejection–whatever your fears may be, you can either let those fears form boundaries beyond which you can’t move or grow, or you can face them head-on and allow them to become opportunities to move into new places in your life.  The choice is truly yours.
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Fear can be paralyzing, literally, for some people.  As a camp counselor many years ago, I helped teach rappelling to high-school students, and there were some who were eager to step off the edge of the cliff and experience the thrill of zipping down on a rope.  But there were some who were so afraid of heights (or more specifically, of falling), that no matter how much I tried to assure them that the rope would not break, and that they could completely control their rate of descent, they simply froze up and could not take that first step over the edge.
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Fear is not always a bad thing.  There are obviously some things about which we should be afraid and in which we should exercise appropriate caution.  But if our fears control us, or prevent us from taking certain risks, we allow those fears to define us, to limit us only to courses of action that we deem sufficiently safe, and as a result, many of us never achieve our potential–or we cheat ourselves out of the richness that life could otherwise hold for us.
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1.  Realize that everyone is afraid of something.
I am the only person in my household who is not deathly afraid of spiders.  If a spider of any size or species turns up anywhere in my house and my wife or one of my children sees it, I have to drop whatever I am doing to deal with it.  Once, while I was out of town on a business trip, I got a phone call from my wife, who was in a state of panic because there was a spider in the kitchen.  (I had to make arrangements for a neighbor to come over and kill it.)  Spiders don’t bother me, but if a wasp gets anywhere near me, I simply have to leave.  On one occasion, I jumped from the top of a twenty-foot ladder while painting a house, fearing a wasp that was hovering nearby far more than the risk of injuring myself seriously by jumping off the ladder.
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Others may not fear the same things you fear, but everyone fears something, and understanding this can help you not to feel isolated in your fear.  You’re not alone, and the fact that you are fearful in some area doesn’t make you a weak person.
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Try this:  find someone to talk to about your fears–you may find that someone else has faced the same fears as you, and has found a way through them that can help you.
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2.  You don’t have to overcome your fear all at once.
When my daughters were very young–still toddlers–we enrolled them in swimming lessons with a friend who taught children as young as six months old to swim.  She didn’t do this by just tossing the kids into the water on the first day.  She gradually introduced them to the water, holding them and allowing them to get used to it, teaching them how to float on their backs and so on, until eventually, they were able to jump in and swim on their own.
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If you are fearful of public speaking, for example, you may not want to begin addressing this fear by booking a speaking gig in front of a thousand people.  As a high-school student, I was abnormally shy, so as you might imagine, my sophomore speech class was a serious challenge for me. 
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My first speech assignment was to introduce myself to the class with a five-minute talk about myself, and after about two minutes of stuttering through my notes in abject terror, my field of vision literally began to narrow, and I thought I might actually black out on the spot, so I just stopped and went back to my seat without finishing.  I got an “F” for that assignment, and my teacher, knowing that I was really struggling with stage fright, asked me come see her after school.  She was understanding and encouraging, and let me give her my speech one-on-one, and the next time I had to give a speech, I did much better. 
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I went on to study broadcast journalism in college, which involved reporting and occasionally anchoring our college television newscast, and one of my first jobs after college involved weekly talks to groups of teenagers.  These days I face a crowd of several hundred people every week, and although I still get a few butterflies now and then, I’m far more at ease than I was that day in high school.  But it didn’t happen all at once.  Remember:  baby steps are okay.
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Try this:  write down something you are afraid of, some fear you want to overcome, and make a list of three small steps you think you CAN make to begin facing up to your fear.  Choose one and do it tomorrow.
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3. Approach your fears as opportunities for growth.
You don’t really want to be afraid, do you?  If you think about what your life might be like if you weren’t afraid of that thing, whatever it is, you know that things would be better.  If you look beyond the fear to the benefits of overcoming the fear, you may see a world that might just be worth taking some risk to live in.

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Take a few minutes and make a list of the pros and cons of dealing with the thing that you’re afraid of:
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1) What are the potential benefits of overcoming that fear?
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2) How might your life be different if you weren’t afraid of it?
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3) What would you be free to do that you aren’t free to do now because of your fear?
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4) What do you have to lose by giving up that fear?
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If you can objectively appraise the advantages to moving past your fear, you may come to see your fear as an opportunity to grow.  The adage, “nothing ventured, nothing gained,” and all of its various permutations (e.g., “no guts, no glory”) are based on the time-tested principle that we can’t grow if we don’t allow ourselves to be stretched.  You know this is true in the physical realm–a muscle that isn’t regularly used eventually atrophies and becomes useless–and it is no less true in other areas of our lives.

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Try this:  write a paragraph or two about how your life will be different when you overcome that fear that has dogged you for so long, and why the potential benefits are worth some risk.
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4. Be careful how you talk to yourself about what you fear.
Sometimes we are fearful of what we imagine might happen if we step outside of our comfort zone.  It’s all too easy to convince yourself that your reasons for being afraid are all valid.   I once heard a wise man say, “More important than what happens to us is how we talk to ourselves about what happens to us.”  This is so true–we can imagine all sorts of negative things when we contemplate something we’re afraid of, but this doesn’t make those things real.
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It is entirely natural to be fearful of the unknown.  You don’t know what might happen if you make that phone call to the person who intimidates you, or you’re not sure how the boss might react if you really speak your mind.  Why not go ahead and make a list of the possible outcomes?  What do you really have to lose if you take the risk?  Seeing that list on paper may help you see how irrational some of your fears really are.  Don’t forget to include in your list the possibility that things might turn out for the better.
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Try this:  instead of convincing yourself to believe the worst about something you fear, try imagining the best.
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5. Failure isn’t necessarily the end of the world.
If there is one fear that is common to nearly all of us, it is the fear of failure.  While there are some scenarios in which failure is potentially devastating, or perhaps even life-threatening, most of the time it isn’t.  Yet the fear of failure short-circuits ideas, stymies careers and deprives us of experiences and opportunities that could enrich our lives.
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If you have an idea and don’t try it for fear of failure, you’ve just given someone else the chance to try it instead–and someone else will, if you don’t.  Thomas Edison is often credited with the invention of the incandescent light bulb in 1878, but the truth is that the light bulb was actually invented decades earlier. 
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In 1802, Sir Humphrey Davy discovered that electricity could make a thin strip of platinum glow and give off light, but because platinum was so expensive, he didn’t develop the idea much further. 
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In 1840, James Bowman Lindsay put a platinum filament into a glass bulb and removed most of the air so that the filament wouldn’t oxidize, and thus the first working light bulb was created.  But again, the expense of platinum prevented him from producing the bulb commercially.  Edison came along more than 30 years later, bought the previous patents, and experimented with thousands of different materials for filaments that could be commercially produced, eventually developing a filament from carbonized bamboo that would last for 1200 hours.  He didn’t stop there–Edison went on to design an electric power distribution system that would make the use of light bulbs practical and profitable.
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One could argue that all but one of Edison’s attempts to perfect the electric light bulb was a failure.  Edison considered each failed filament to be an important lesson–he had learned yet another material that would not work.  But perhaps more importantly, he didn’t let the road blocks that others had met deter him.
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Our failures can be dead-ends or learning experiences that can lead us to try other routes to success, depending on how we treat them.  “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”  That’s a very old saying, but it’s great advice.
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Try this:  if you’re afraid to fail at something, make yourself a list of the things you can try if you do fail at first.  It never hurts to plan ahead.  (They put redundant systems on the Space Shuttle for this very reason.)
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So what are you afraid of?

If you’re not living the life you truly desire, what is it that keeps you from doing so? For many people, change represents a risk, and big change can represent an unacceptable degree of risk.

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What kind of risk?

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The risk that things will not work out the way we want them to.  In other words, fear of the unknown. Weather we like our current reality or not, there’s a certain amount of security attached to doing things we’re familiar with.

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On the other hand, trying something new in order to improve our life creates room for a lot of what-ifs.  What if I try and fail? What if I invest my time and energy and things don’t work out.  What if I commit to this new relationship and it falls apart?

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Anytime we think about trying new ways to improve our lives, questions are going to arise.  How we respond to those internal questions will determine whether we are willing to take risks or not.

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Every new opportunity has some risk attached to it.

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Whenever we venture outside of what’s familiar, we encounter the unknown.  Why do some people get excited about trying new things, while others fear them?  What’s the difference between excitement and fear?

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Much depends on whether you are primarily pessimistic or optimistic.  For a pessimist, the negative what-ifs represent a stronger influence on their perspective.  The possibility that things will go wrong creates fearful expectation.

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Some might say that this is a lack of courage, but that’s not entirely accurate.  It really has more to do with emotional anchors.  When past efforts have failed to produce the desired result, it’s easy to develop a response pattern based on past performance.  Internally, our emotional dialogue says, “Nothing like this has ever worked out before, why should it work out this time?”

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On the other hand, the optimist may have a history of successes, which helps him to maintain a positive perspective.  He associates trying new things with producing exciting results.  For the optimist there is opportunity in the unknown.  This does not mean that he is more courageous than the pessimist.  It just means that his emotional anchors are different.  His internal dialogue says, “every time I try something new it turns out great, why should this be any different?”
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Changing our response patterns.

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So, are we to conclude that our past performance will always dictate our view of the unknown?  Can we change our viewpoint from pessimistic to optimistic?

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We certainly can, all we need to do is change our perspective.  Is the glass half full or half empty?  It depends on which have you focus on.  Does trying something new represent too much of a risk, or is it an exciting opportunity? Again, It depends on what you focus on.

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If you focus on the opportunity, it will expand.  You will begin to notice new possibilities that you never saw before.  The more you focus on those possibilities the more optimistic you will become.

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Being optimistic does not remove the risk.

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Remember, every opportunity has risk involved.  It’s not a case for removing the risk; it’s a matter of changing our perspective.  We don’t want to deny that there’s risk involved. But we don’t want to see the risk as fearful expectation.  Blind optimism is no better than paralyzing pessimism.

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We need to achieve balance in our view of things, while still maintaining a positive perspective.  If our past efforts have not produced the desired result, then we should examine why.  There’s always a reason.  Once we understand the reason, we can take steps to change the results we produce.

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Asking why something happened introduces logic into the equation.  This is a great way to destabilize unwanted emotional anchors.  The more you ask why, the less emotionally rooted the whole experience becomes. Past experiences do not determine future results.  Response patterns can be changed.  Used correctly, logic can help us to achieve that.
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Our emotions are among our most powerful resource. Learning to use reason and logic to direct that power gives us the best possible results.
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