One of the most important features of beginning a new friendship is to not be scared. When making friends there is a tendency to make assumptions on what another person may be thinking. A guy may think, “I’d like to dance with that lovely lady, but I am not good looking enough and she is going to say no, I’m sure”.
Meantime she is thinking, “I wish that hunky guy over there would ask me to dance!” Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. If you don’t ask, you don’t get! The absolute worst thing that can possibly happen is a lady says no. Relationship or friendship can be a numbers game, the next lady will say yes!
It’s not about what others think
People who are not secure when it comes to making friends are usually scared of what other people are thinking. Who really cares what other people think? Nobody is perfect and if someone doesn’t seem to like you, then it’s their problem, not yours. Talk to someone else!
Always remember that in the beginning of a friendship everyone is on his or her best behavior. Give everything a little time. There are occasions when an instant friendship occurs but mostly it takes time to develop. When making friends don’t be all over the other person at first; just take it easy as you get to know each other.
Choose honesty
We cannot expect to go through life without having a personality clash with someone. Often people are frightened of upsetting someone else in case they lose the friendship. If the other party cannot accept honesty and communication then they are not much of a friend! Either that or they are manipulating you in some way and you don’t need that!
You cannot have an argument if only one person argues. Think about that, we all have different points of view and good friends agree to disagree and get on with their lives. It is most important when you have a good friend not to play games or try to change them. Unfortunately some people tend to do this. Why change what is working? It is a quick way to end the relationship.
Embrace true friendship
True friendship consists of rejoicing in the other person’s good fortunes, offering cheer in times of distress, sympathy in adversity, advice during trouble, and material help in times of real need. True friendship is broad and inclusive.
Value a friendship, for it is an expression of the flower of true love. If you hold a flower in your hand, how can you crush it?
Excerpt from ‘Solutions with Pearls of Wisdom’ by Michael Cambray
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