Are you in touch with your fears, or have you hidden them in the dark recesses of your subconscious mind? We all harbor certain fears, and it can be an uncomfortable experience to pull them out into the open.
Does it bother you to talk about your fears? Do you ever feel like you are the only one with those feelings? Would you be willing to coax those fears out of hiding if there was a chance of getting rid of them once and for all?
Everyone is afraid of something
At some point in time we have all allowed our fears to get the best of us. Lately, the economic uncertainty and the related challenges have become an emotional breeding ground for new feelings of fear, anxiety, and insecurity. Can you relate to this?
Most hidden fears are some combination of guilt and panic. Why those two feelings? Well, let’s take the fear created by economic uncertainty as an example. If, because of unavoidable circumstances, you have lost your income and others depend on you, then it is easy to feel guilty for letting them down. On top of that, it’s easy for feelings of panic to creep in because you can’t figure out a way to remedy the situation. See what I mean about guilt and panic, they are a deadly combination.
Drag those fearful feelings into the light
Here is something you need to remember, fearful energy is like a fungus that grows in darkness. As long as your feelings of fear reside in the dark recesses of your subconscious mind they will continue to grow. If something isn’t done to correct the situation you may eventually begin to feel paralyzed by those feelings.
The way to combat the malignant growth of fearful energy is to stop avoiding it and pull it into the light where it can be examined and dealt with. Granted, this can feel extremely intimidating, but it’s nothing compared to the adverse effects allowing those fearful feelings to continue expanding unchecked.
Fear runs on an emotional power source
Even though your fears are usually related to some personal challenge, they are not the same. Fear is an emotional response to the challenge, but it has an adverse effect on your ability to deal with the challenge in a resourceful way. That’s why the fearful feelings need to be dealt with first.
As long as your fears remain in hiding they are protected by a shield of negative emotional armor. Once you gather the courage to pull them out into the open that shield weakens and becomes vulnerable to your powers of reason and logic. Now you can use questions to whittle those fearful feelings down to size.
1) How does it serve me to allow these feelings into my life?
2) Does holding this fear help me overcome my challenge?
3) Is there any logical reason not to let go of this fear?
4) Can I choose to reframe the fear energy into motivation?
5) Can I do that right now?
What just happened? With just a few logical questions you have stopped a giant energy leak and made those resources available for finding a solution to your challenge. Yes, the challenge is still there, but now you are in a much more resourceful state to deal with it. From here, make a plan to deal with the challenge and start taking action. The more action you take the more resourceful and less fearful you will be.
Be proactive when dealing with your feelings of fear
Fear comes in all shapes and sizes: When left unchecked it can put a stranglehold on our lives and relationships. When we are under the influence of fear it robs us of the very resources that can help us overcome the underlying problem. Clearly, leaving your fears alone does not mean that they will leave you alone. Better to deal with them.
Hidden fear can have a paralyzing effect on your life, and it can surface when you least expect it. A life of true happiness and security is only possible if we have the courage to face our fears and overcome them. I hope this information has been helpful.
Are you currently dealing with any hidden fears?
Did you discover something that needs to be dealt with?
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Want a blueprint for reframing fearful energy into motivation and excitement? This process is clearly outlined in section five of my book, TRUE SELF. That section covers the Power Connection on the True Self Connection Wheel.
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{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
I have only one fear and that’s flying, but I do it anyway.
Like you said: The way to combat the malignant growth of fearful energy is to stop avoiding it.
Frank Jovine recently posted..Yonkers Raceway Picks 9-15-2011
Hey Frank, Good for you! Hopefully, the more you do it the less it will bother you. If that doesn’t work you could always go to flight school and get your pilot’s license
My fears lay with commitment issues. I am afraid of vulnerability issues.This is a huge issue to committing to someone again.
Hi Bunny, first off let me just say that it takes courage to talk about things like fear of commitment in a public forum. I commend you for your courage and honesty. Hopefully, one of these days someone will come along who is truly worthy of your trust. You deserve that.
I like the fact that you recommend that we confront our fears head on and bring it out into the light. How do you do that effectively though? I use journaling and verbal confrontation a lot. Either I talk to my fears or I write out my fears. After that, I will rip the paper off and throw it away. End of fear. The list of empowering questions you have given now certainly will help in my future confrontations.
Cheers
Jimmy/Life Architect recently posted..25 Elementary Principles for Success in Life – Principle 20
Hi Jimmy, many fears are based on an imagined “worst case scenario.” In that case we can simply list:
1) The best possible outcome.
2) The worst possible outcome.
3) The most likely outcome.
Doing this step after you have used the five questions from the article to whittle those fearful feelings down to size will make room for a more logical analysis. After listing the three possible outcome scenarios assign a percentage of likelihood to each. You will discover that the actual risk factor is much less than you first imagined it to be. Next, decide if it is a risk you can live with before you make any commitments.
Hi Jon,
Thanks for the advice here. You have made really a simple process to follow.
Cheers
Love your post on FEAR and how guilt and panic are part of this FEAR idea…….Fear is what stops us from living – I’m sure you have heard that F.E.A.R. stands for False Evidence Appearing Real!
So in that said, we create the monsters in our heads (FEARS) to be even bigger than they are. To move into the fear and feel it – is bliss! For like pain, to move into the pain and feel the pain then you can go through the pain……the word here is “move” like you said and ACTION verb!
Living in the possibilities,
Nancy
Nancy Shields recently posted..CYBER FRIENDSHIP VERSUS TRADITIONAL FRIENDSHIP
Hi Nancy, I am reminded of how some children are afraid of the dark. Why are they afraid? Because in the absence of light the imagination takes over. Once they get the courage to experience the darkness they quickly discover there was nothing to be afraid of. Most fear lives in our head.
There’s a powerful scene in the movie Apocalypto where the father of the lead character is talking about the danger of allowing fear to take hold because once it does it takes on a life of it’s own and spreads. Enjoyed your article, thanks for the inspiration!
marquita herald recently posted..The Research on Gratitude
Hi Marquita, that is so true about how fear can take on a life of its own and spread or grow. Thanks for sharing that.
Great post, Jonathan. I believe that the difficult part of hidden fears is that they are truly hidden, so bringing them into the light is the most difficult thing to do.
We all have them at the level of our life where we are challenged the most, without being aware of them. I truly think that becoming aware of them is even more challenging than dealing with them, but truly necessary if we want to grow.
Thanks for bringing this up again!
Thanks for this
marc van der Linden recently posted..The 7 universal fears
Hi Marc, the reason they can remain hidden is because fear is emotionally based. When we search for it intellectually our ego (also emotionally based) will hide it from our radar. The best tool for shining the light of logic on fear is a carefully constructed series of probing questions designed to coax those hidden fears out into the light so they can be seen for what they really are.
Your posts have lots of great info and suggestions for application in life! The subconscious is a powerful place when you shine some light in it.
When we want to get something out of our awareness or we want to suppress a feeling we don’t like, do you ever ask where it goes? Into the subconscious which is the back of your mind. And the back of your mind is out of sight behind you. All those feelings we hold inside are locked into the muscles in our necks, backs and hips.
When we are ready to feel, express and move on, we move outside our comfort zones into a new range of emotion. This is directly associated with a new range of physical motion in the body.
Hi Paul, few people realize that every thought has a corresponding point in the body. Much like the other end of a nerve thread, the influence of that thought energy finds physical expression in that point. This is why practices like reflexology will release emotions as the corresponding nerve points are manipulated. The tendency to think of the mind and body as two separate entities denies our holistic oneness.
I have such a fear of snakes. I haven been able to defeat this fear. As of lately when i see a snake I stay and get my breathing under control and learn to control the emotions that are brought up.
Good for you James, face those fears. I remember the first time I came face to face with a rattlesnake. I imagined that he could fly through air and bite me. Once I discovered that they could only strike the distance of their neck, that fear shrunk by about 90%. Still, the unexpected sound of their rattle can definitely put your nervous system on high alert.
Useful article. I have also been battling with hidden fears all my life. I hope to put this information to good practice in my life.