Have you ever wished for a simpler life where you and all your neighbors interacted in a more sharing and caring way? Do you see yourself as someone who gets along well with others and makes a valuable contribution to all those around you? Do you ever feel shortchanged by your lot in life?

Sometimes our view of reality is a bit skewed because we see life from our own unique little vantage point. And isn’t it amazing how all that can change in a big hurry when we get an unexpected reality check? That’s what I want to offer you today, a reality check by means of a perspective shift with regard to your world and the people on it.

Shrinking the world changes our perspective

Perhaps if the whole world were a small village of 100 people it would be a lot easier to see firsthand what’s really going on with the human race. When we think in terms of global population the big numbers tend to distort our ability to comprehend things. The reality and proportions of any given situation are generally easier to comprehend when we shrink things down to a number that we can relate to.

This information is intended only as a reality check that will hopefully give most of us some legitimate reasons to feel very, very grateful. And I think that we can all agree that gratitude is a wonderful thing.

Perhaps reading this will move us all to look for ways to contribute more to the human family. Conscious awareness, compassion, and fellow feeling are an important first step toward solving any problem and this is especially true of big problems.

Here’s the scenario for our reality check

If we could reduce the world’s population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all existing human ratios remaining the same, the demographics would look something like this:

The village would have 60 Asians, 14 Africans, 12 Europeans, 8 Latin Americans, 5 from the USA and Canada, and 1 from the South Pacific.

This is how things would pencil out

* 51 would be male, 49 would be female
* 82 would be non-white; 18 white
* 67 would be non-Christian; 33 would be Christian
* 80 would live in substandard housing
* 67 would be unable to read
* 50 would be malnourished and 1 dying of starvation
* 33 would be without access to a safe water supply
* 39 would lack access to improved sanitation
* 24 would not have any electricity (And of the 76 that do have electricity, 
. .most would only use it for light at night.)
* 7 people would have access to the Internet. You are in that 7% minority!
* 1 would have a college education
* 1 would have HIV
* 2 would be near birth; 1 near death
* 5 would control 32% of the entire world’s wealth; all 5 would be
. .US citizens
* 33 would be receiving and attempting to live on only 3% of the 
. .income of the entire village

How is your reality looking now?

No matter who you are, when you look over this list and consider your situation, you can probably see a plenty of reasons to count your blessings. I know that I sure do!

How’s your situation looking now?
What did this reality check do for you?
The lines are open!

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We are all aware of the benefits that come from being appreciative and grateful. But sometimes that’s easier said than done. In the face of a sinking economy, do you find it difficult to be appreciative? When it feels like your very way of life is being threatened, can you still find reasons to be grateful?

Yes, sometimes finding the good in a situation can seem like looking for the proverbial needle in a haystack. Yet, the benefits of being in a state of genuine appreciation in spite of what’s going on around us are worth investigating. This is where focus comes into the picture. We can actually train ourselves to search for, discover, and focus on legitimate reasons to feel appreciation.

Seek and you shall find

Regardless of where we are, or what we may be doing, there is always something in our life worth appreciating. The challenge is to train ourselves to automatically search for reasons to manifest appreciation.

This may or may not be your natural tendency, but with practice all of us can certainly develop the appreciation habit.

Have you ever been around someone who never has a bad word to say about anyone or anything? How do you feel while in the company of that person? It’s refreshing, isn’t it?

Conversely, have you ever been around someone who always has something negative to say? How does that make you feel? Nobody likes to be around Mr. Bummer, especially since negative attitudes can be so contagious.

So the first thing we can do is to seek out friends and associates whose tendency is toward the positive side. At the same time, to the degree possible, we want to avoid spending too much time with those who like to dwell on the dark side. Choosing our associates wisely can really help us to cultivate the right attitude.

Now that we’ve surrounded ourselves with a more positive group of people, what should we do next?

Become a treasure hunter

We want to develop the habit of searching for, and discovering, something to appreciate about every person, situation, or experience we encounter.

Admittedly, this can be difficult sometimes. That’s why I likened it to a treasure hunt. Even if the situation you are in seems to be 99% negative, could you locate that one percent that is worthy of your appreciation? Once located, could you focus on it?

I was thinking about people that pan for gold. Almost all of what fills their gold pan is just rubble, but where is their focus? Most of the time, they don’t even see the gravel and sand because they are searching for the sparkle. They’re looking for that tiny, little fragment of gold, and they are so focused that their mind filters out everything else.

What happens when they find that little piece of gold? They get excited, their focus increases, and their appreciation grows. Could we apply that approach to our daily life?

Choose your orientation

Popular opinion and the nightly news seem to have combined to paint a very negative picture. How much have these two, powerful forces influenced your personal viewpoint?

It is far too easy to adopt the perspective of the majority when you are surrounded by negativity, but in this case it’s not a very healthy option. To keep your perspective, you need to learn to think for yourself, and avoid letting others do it for you. That means you need to find ways of limiting your exposure to those who influence your thinking in a negative direction. That way you can…

1) Stay informed, but without getting too absorbed.
2) Choose to focus on the positive aspects of every situation.
3) Change the subject when a conversation starts to go negative.

Everything is seeking balance

When the natural state of balance is disrupted, something always happens to correct the situation. Sometimes a correction may seem painful, but that does not mean that it’s a bad thing.

If you push yourself too hard, for too long, while ignoring your health and the need for rest, what will happen? Chances are, you’ll get sick. Nobody likes to be sick, but in reality it’s just your body’s way of seeking balance. You needed to rest and recover, and being sick provides the opportunity to do just that.

If you find yourself in this situation, could you appreciate the fact that you are now getting some much-needed rest? See, there is always something that we can appreciate.

If an economy pushes itself too hard, it gets out of balance. Right now the economy is sick because it needs to rest and recover. Can we appreciate that the end result will be a healthier, more balanced economy?

Use questions to build your sense of appreciation

Regardless of the situation you find yourself in, asking the right questions, or making the right statements, can help you discover reasons to be appreciative.

For example:

1) What is there about this person, situation, or experience that I can
…. appreciate?
2) What valuable lesson has this experience taught me?
3) How can I benefit from this person’s example? (Even if it’s an
…. example of what not to do.)
4) What is this person’s most outstanding, positive characteristic?
5) How can I inject some positive energy into this situation?

If you cultivate the habit of focusing on the positive, your level of appreciation will increase. As you find more and more reasons to appreciate every aspect of your life, you will become a magnet for attracting positive energy. And that positive energy flowing into your life will give you even more cause for appreciation.

Now it’s up to you.
Will you allow appreciation to change your life?

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My book TRUE SELF is the fastest inexpensive way (coaching is the fastest) to make positive life changes very quickly. From discovering and dismantling your limiting beliefs, to aligning with and realizing your most cherished goals – and everything in between. TRUE SELF will guide you through the process.

I am a big believer in using the power of gratitude to create positive changes. Being constantly aware of your many blessings, and feeling grateful for them, can have a huge impact on the quality of your life. When you are filled with appreciation, it quite literally changes the dynamic of your reality.

I find it truly amazing how one, simple, positive action can change so much in a person’s life. In fact, recognizing the profound power of gratitude is one of the things that have had a huge effect on my life. It has made me a more positive and caring person. It has also made me a better husband, father, and friend. I can honestly say that in some very tangible ways, gratitude has made my life better.

Harness the power of gratitude

Now you might not get the same exact benefits as I have, but I can pretty much guarantee that practicing gratitude and appreciation can change your life as well.  There’s no doubt in my mind that the simple act of being grateful on a regular basis will change your perception in very positive ways. How many other simple strategies do you know that can make such a claim?

Let’s take a look at some practical ways that you can start incorporating gratitude into your life so you can start enjoying the benefits immediately. Of course, these are just some examples based on my personal experience and the experiences of others I’ve talked with. Obviously, not all of them will apply to you, so just choose the ones that you feel comfortable with.

7 ways to improve your life with gratitude

1. Have a morning gratitude review. Make it a daily ritual to take one minute in the morning to think of all the people and things in your life that you are grateful for. You won’t get to everything in one minute’s time, but it’s enough to get you thinking in the right direction. A simple gratitude review will instantly set the tone for the rest of the day and help you focus your attention on other things to appreciate about your life. Can you think of a better use of one minute?

2. When you are having a hard day, make a gratitude list. We all have those challenging days from time to time. During those difficult days it can be hard to maintain a positive outlook. One of the things that can make a bad day much better is to take a break and make a list of all the things you are thankful for. No matter what you are going through, there are always things to be thankful for. Making a list of those things will shift your focus and make you feel much more resourceful.

3. Instead of getting mad at someone, show gratitude. I know this isn’t always the easiest thing because it requires a complete reversal in attitude. But I can promise you that it’s a great thing to do for your own peace of mind. If you get mad, try to bite your tongue and resist the temptation to react in anger. Instead, take some deep breaths, calm down, and try to think of reasons you’re grateful for that person. Find something, anything, even if it’s something very small. Then focus only on that reason to feel grateful. Slowly your mood will begin to shift away from anger toward a more empowering state.

4. Instead of criticizing, show gratitude. This is similar to the strategy above, but much less challenging. This simple tactic can literally transform an important relationship like a marriage. If you constantly criticize your spouse, your marriage will slowly deteriorate. Yes, it’s important to be able to talk out problems, but no one likes to be criticized all the time. So, when you find yourself feeling the urge to criticize, stop and get a grip on yourself. Now take a moment to think about all the reasons you are truly grateful for your spouse. Then share that gratitude, as soon as possible and watch as your relationship becomes stronger.

5. When you face a major challenge, be grateful for it. Many people will see difficulties as a reason to complain and feel sorry for themselves. Trust me, that attitude won’t get you anywhere. Instead, try to see the positive aspects associated with those difficult experiences. Could you appreciate them as an opportunity to learn and grow? This simple change in perception can transform a challenge into something positive with possible long term benefits. But for that to happen we need to cultivate an attitude of gratitude.

6. Express gratitude to others at every opportunity. Say thank you whenever someone shows you the least bit of consideration. Doing this will make you feel better and it will encourage others to be more considerate. There are plenty of rude and inconsiderate people in the world, but you can be a force for good simply by spreading some gratitude around. Be on the lookout for even small acts of kindness. When you notice them be quick to express appreciation and watch what happens. You can use the power of your gratitude to help others feel good about themselves.

7. Focus on what you have not what you don’t have. Have you ever looked around you and felt shortchanged because the place you live isn’t your dream house or the car you drive isn’t as nice as you would like? It’s easy to forget that there are billions of people who are much worse off than you are. Those people would be so grateful to have what you have.  When you compare your life to these people’s lives, you can’t help but feel grateful for the life you have.  You may not have everything, but you must admit that you have been blessed in many ways.

Make the shift and enjoy the benefits

The more you focus on gratitude the more you will appreciate your life and the happier you will be. An appreciative attitude will also make you more aware of your blessings and prevent you from taking them for granted. Remember, the happiest people are not the ones who have the best of everything, they are the ones who are grateful for everything they have.

What are you grateful for?

If you enjoyed this article, consider email or RSS updates!

My book TRUE SELF is the fastest inexpensive way (coaching is the fastest) to make positive life changes very quickly. Do you want to discover your core passions, dismantle your hidden, limiting beliefs, and realize your most desired goals? TRUE SELF will guide you smoothly through the process.

We all know that being grateful and appreciative is very beneficial, but have you ever noticed that it’s often easier said than done?

In the face of a sinking economy and mounting demands on your time, do you find it difficult to remain grateful and appreciative? When you feel stressed out and overwhelmed, can you still find reasons to be grateful?

Sometimes finding the good in a trying situation can by pretty challenging. Yet, the benefits of maintaining genuine gratitude and appreciation in spite of what’s going on around us, are certainly worth looking into.

This is where focus comes to the rescue. We can actually train ourselves to search for, discover, and focus on legitimate reasons to feel grateful and appreciative.

Learning to count your blessings

We all have blessings in our life! No matter where we are, and regardless of what we might be going through, there are always things we can be grateful for. The challenge is to train ourselves to focus on gratitude, and to intuitively search for reasons to manifest appreciation.

This may, or may not be your natural tendency, but with practice, all of us can certainly develop a predominate attitude of gratitude backed up with true expressions of appreciation.

Do you know people like this?

Do you know someone who never has a bad word to say about anyone or anything? Someone who just naturally sees the silver lining, even around the darkest cloud? How do you feel when you are in the company of that person? Don’t you feel refreshed and positive?

What about on the other end of the spectrum? Do you know someone who always needs to point out the negative aspect of every situation? How does that make you feel? Nobody feels empowered around someone like that, especially since negative attitudes can infect those who are exposed to them regularly.

Pick your friends and associates wisely

When trying to cultivate a greater sense of gratitude, we should seek out those whose dominant tendency is positive and upbuilding. It’s also a good idea to avoid spending too much time with those who like to dwell on the negative. Choosing our associates wisely can really help us to cultivate greater gratitude and appreciation.

Once we’ve taken steps to surround ourselves with a more positive group of people, what should we do next?

Train yourself to notice the good

Now, It’s time to develop a new habit. The habit of finding something to appreciate about every person, situation, or experience we encounter.

Admittedly, this can be difficult sometimes. You might try turning it into a game of sorts. Even if the situation you are in seems to be 99% negative, could you challenge yourself to locate that 1% that is worthy of your appreciation? Once found, could you focus on it?

I know several people who just love to pan for gold. Funny thing is, most of the time their gold pans are filled with rubble. This doesn’t seem to bother them, do you know why? It’s because that’s not where their focus is. They are so intent on finding something that sparkles that they don’t even notice the piles of worthless sand and gravel. There focus is on searching for that tiny, little, fragment of gold and their mind filters out everything else.

How do they react when they finally discover a little fleck of gold? They usually don’t say, “I had to work way too hard to find that little piece of gold.” Instead they get really excited, their focus intensifies, and their gratitude and appreciation skyrocket. Could we apply that same approach to our day-to-day life?

Choose the direction of your focus

Seems that an overly sensationalized news media has managed to influence popular opinion toward fear and negativity. How much has your perception been influenced by this constant bombardment of negative news?

It can be very difficult to resist adopting the perspective of constant negativity when you are surrounded by it. To maintain a perspective of gratitude and appreciation, we need to break from the mentality of the masses, and learn to think for ourselves. We need to make a conscious effort to filter the information we are exposed to. That means we need to find ways of limiting our exposure to negative input. We also need to be willing to take action to actively move away from sources that influence us in a negative way.

7 Ways to protect and cultivate your feelings of gratitude

1) Don’t get pulled in to negative talk. When a conversation you’re in starts to go negative, don’t be afraid to be the one who changes the subject. If that doesn’t work be willing to excuse yourself.

2) Help others turn away from negativity. If someone you know persists in talking about negative things all the time, find a tactful way to tell them that you really don’t appreciate it. They may not even realize that they’re doing it, and you could be doing them a huge favor.

3) Show gratitude. Willingly express gratitude and appreciation for those around you. Tell them specifically what you appreciate and why. Then you can feel grateful that you were able to shine a little sunshine into their life.

4) See the big picture. When you find yourself in a difficult situation, look for the beneficial aspects created by that situation. Ask yourself: “What have I learned here that will benefit me in the future? When I look back on this experience a year from now, what will I be grateful for?”

5) Control your response. If someone criticizes you don’t get defensive. Respond by saying something like: “Thank you for bringing that to my attention, I’ll give it some careful consideration.” You can be grateful that you didn’t allow them to push your buttons, and who knows, maybe their point was valid and your life will be better for considering it.

6) Look for reasons to say thank you. When other people sense that you appreciate them it changes the dynamic of your relationship. Everyone loves to be appreciated. They’ll be more inclined to do nice things for you because you appreciate their efforts. In turn, you’ll have even more reasons to feel gratitude.

7) Have a gratitude review. Do this as soon as you wake up in the morning and before you go to sleep at night. Remember to count your blessings daily. Think of all the things you have to be grateful for. If you start and end each day with gratitude your whole life will shift in a more positive direction. It only takes a minute or two to allow gratitude fill your heart and mind.

Why am I overflowing with gratitude?

Because of you, that’s why! You graciously use some of your valuable time to visit this blog and show your support. You leave wonderful comments that raise the level of conversation and provide deep insight. You unselfishly share your positive energy, experiences, encouragement, and feedback.

I want to use this opportunity to say THANK YOU for making Advanced Life Skills the success that it is today. Please believe me when I say that your being here is never taken for granted. I am truly grateful for each and every one of you!

What are you grateful for?

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Two days before our recent major holiday, I was finishing up an article for Advanced Life Skills, and when I went to close the page something unexpected happened. All of a sudden, my page began to replicate itself over and over again. Within a few seconds, I had 50, 60, and more copies of the same page on the screen, and the process just kept going.

What’s the best thing to do situation like that?

I don’t really know, but my first instinct was to hit the power button, so that’s what I did, and of course, the computer shut down. I waited a couple minutes, then I turned it back on to make sure everything was all right.

Well, everything was definitely not all right

For some reason the computer no longer recognized its own hard drive. I tried for an hour or two to come up with a solution, but to no prevail. So, my computer was down and the whole world was getting ready for a holiday.

Have you ever noticed how things like this seem to happen at the most inconvenient times? Thankfully, I know a really great computer tech, who I contacted early the next morning. He said he was swamped, but he was willing to try and squeeze me in.

Now here’s where things get really interesting

The next afternoon some friends stopped by, and I notice that they had a brand new computer in their back seat. When I commented, “someone’s been computer shopping,” I was informed that the computer was for me, and that there was nothing I could say or do that was going to change things.

I was completely blown away. Their generosity had absolutely nothing to do with the holidays, and they had no knowledge that my computer had melted. They just felt the urge to do something nice, so that is what they did.

Now I ask you, what are the odds?

Within a few hours of my own computer going down, close friends with no knowledge of my situation were out buying me a brand new computer, just because they felt like it.

Have you ever had anything like this happen to you? If so, then I am sure you can probably relate when I tell you, I was truly touched to the heart. The fact is, I am still touch to the heart whenever I think about it.

It’s amazing how changing events can move our emotions around.

One minute I was facing a perplexing situation, a moment later I was filled with gratitude, and counting my blessings. This is the power of kindness and generosity. The wonderful thing is, even small acts of kindness can have a huge emotional impact on the lives of others. This is something we should all strive to participate in as often as possible.

Seize the moment

How many times during the course of our day do we have an up opportunity to encourage someone with a smile or a kind word? Such opportunities are abundant if we stay alert to them.

Anyway, back to the story

My Computer Tech managed to salvage about half of the files on my computer, and let’s face it, half is better than none. Still, as you can imagine, I’ve spent the last week reorganizing and reflecting. It’s a safe bet that I will be more scrupulous about backing up files from here on out. But that’s not the most important lesson that I learned from this experience.

I think the most important thing I have learned is a renewed and even greater sense of appreciation for those whose friendship I value so deeply. As we leave 2008 behind, and look ahead to a brand new year, let’s think about the value of friends, and the power of kindness and generosity.

Things are changing

It’s far too easy to get caught up in our daily lives, and forget to take the time to fully appreciate the people around us. I feel there is a growing awareness of this tendency, along with an important fundamental shift in personal values? Have you noticed that increasing numbers of people are paying more attention to things like personal growth and development?

If you read this blog regularly and others like it, then you are among that special group. I commend you for your awareness and your contribution. I also look forward to interacting and sharing with each and every one of you the coming year, as we all do our part to raise the collective consciousness of those we interact with.

I want to take this opportunity to thank all of our loyal readers for a really great year, and to say that I truly value and appreciate your support. We have a lot to look forward to, and much to be grateful for.

Dear Friends,

Just a quick note to say, if you have not seen the movie “The Ultimate Gift” consider renting it. The lessons it teaches are valuable for young and old alike.
Here’s a list:

• The Gift of Work
• The Gift of Problems
• The Gift of Friends
• The Gift of Giving
• The Gift of Gratitude
• The Gift of Family
• The Gift of Learning
• The Gift of Money
• The Gift of Laughter
• The Gift of a Day
• The Gift of Dreams