We have all heard the saying: “It’s not what you know that matters, it’s who you know!” Would you be surprised if I said that the most important application of this principle is also the most overlooked?
We all realize that social connections can put you in touch with the “right people” and that certain business connections can open up amazing career possibilities. We also know that meaningful relationships of all kinds require a close “personal” connection.
What connections are being overlooked?
The most important connections have nothing to do with other people. Not on any level. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that these external connections don’t matter because they certainly do.
What I am saying is that there is a much more personal category of connections that will have a much greater influence on your life. These are connections that you simply can’t afford to overlook. The reason is because this “personal category” actually forms the basis for everything else. It is essentially the foundation that your perception of life is built on!
Build from the ground up
Every building sits on a foundation. If the foundation is solid the integrity of the building is greatly enhanced. If the foundation is faulty it doesn’t matter how much time, effort, or money goes into the building. That building will always be lacking in integrity.
The same can be said of the life we build for ourselves. Without a solid foundation we will never really achieve the quality of life we long for. We will always be susceptible to foundational vulnerabilities like self-sabotaging behaviors and emotional insecurities.
What makes a strong foundation?
Our personal foundation is composed of several interconnected components. These are the connections that determine whether or not our foundation has the integrity to support a high quality life.
If the primary components of our personal foundation are not fully integrated, our life will be vulnerable to collapse. I have identified 7 of these components and I refer to the combination of all 7 as True Self. Let’s take a closer look.
7 Vital Connections making up your True Self
1. The Core Connection. This is where it all begins. The core connection side of your true self is made up of your deeply held values, passions, beliefs, and response patterns. This is the place where your paradigms of pain and pleasure are born and reside. When analyzing our personal perspective of life, this is the very core.
2. The Motive Connection. This is the home of your reasons for doing the things you do. It’s your personal WHY behind your thoughts and actions. Motive is also closely related to your personal definition of complicated concepts like success and failure. Motive is the why part of your true self.
3. The Vision Connection. We all have mental movies of where we are and where we would like to be. Our vision of things like goals and obstacles are highly personalized because we create them based on our unique vantage point. Vision is the driver of our true self.
4. The Path Connection. The course we choose to walk will have a powerful influence on where we end up. This is the journey aspect of our true self. How well thought out that path is should be a matter of primary concern to everyone. Not only do you get to choose your path, but you also assume responsibility for where it leads you.
5. The Power Connection. This has to do with how well we are able to manage several personal resources like focus, motivation, self-talk, and commitment. It also has to do with how much we allow the opposing forces of fear and eager anticipation to influence us. Combined, these resources determine the horse power behind our true self.
6. The Identity Connection. How do you see yourself and your abilities? Are you capable or incapable? Do you approve of yourself or disapprove? Are you comfortable with the idea of success on a personal level, or do you feel undeserving? What does your true self identify with?
7. The Fulfillment Connection. This is the satisfaction side of our true self. Many people never feel any real sense of satisfaction with regard to their accomplishments regardless of how impressive those accomplishments might be. This is usually an indicator that something is missing. Accomplishment without contribution is unfulfilling!
Work on the foundation first
As it turns out, what we know is just as important as who we know. Knowing how to examine your personal foundation can help you to understand yourself with much greater clarity. In turn, knowing yourself better can lead to making wiser decisions about the direction of your life.
In a world with so many choices and so many pressures, can any of us afford to ignore these foundational connections? Obviously not, but the next logical question is: how would we go about examining these vital connections and where would we start? On the surface this might seem like a daunting task, but maybe it’s not really all that difficult. Maybe there is a way to simplify the whole process. If there is, would you be interested?
My book TRUE SELF is the fastest inexpensive way (coaching is the fastest) to make positive life changes very quickly. Do you want to discover your core passions, dismantle your hidden, limiting beliefs, and realize your most desired goals? TRUE SELF will guide you smoothly through the process.